How to Build Self-Control and Self Discipline?



Most individuals look up to and honor strong people who have acquired great success by manifesting self-control and self-discipline.

They look up to individuals who, with self-control, self-discipline, and ambition, have bettered their lives, acquired new skills, overcame difficulties and hardships, cut down on their weight, climbed high in their selected field, or advanced on the spiritual track.

The fact is that everybody can attain high degrees of self-control and self-discipline through a practical technique of training. These inner abilities are not reserved for a couple of special individuals.

Self-control and self-discipline are two of the most significant and valuable inner abilities in everyone’s life and have always been regarded as crucial tools for success in all fields of life.

They may be learned and acquired like any other skill, yet, despite all this, only a few take any steps to grow and strengthen them in an orderly fashion.


Most individuals look up to and honor strong people who have acquired great success by manifesting self-control and self-discipline.

They look up to individuals who, with self-control, self-discipline, and ambition, have bettered their lives, acquired new skills, overcame difficulties and hardships, cut down on their weight, climbed high in their selected field, or advanced on the spiritual track.

The fact is that everybody can attain high degrees of self-control and self-discipline through a practical technique of training. These inner abilities are not reserved for a couple of special individuals.

Self-control and self-discipline are two of the most significant and valuable inner abilities in everyone’s life and have always been regarded as crucial tools for success in all fields of life.

They may be learned and acquired like any other skill, yet, despite all this, only a few take any steps to grow and strengthen them in an orderly fashion.

Aspects that aid in controlling oneself in self-control

Self-control is one of the various divisions of self-development. It is the capacity to encourage oneself to do the right things in life and curb our animal desires.

However, the root of this self-development lies in strong willpower and disciplining oneself. Self-control produces a kind of confidence in us for the things that we think are difficult to achieve.

It creates a drive of perseverance in us that makes us accomplish our goals. One’s motivation empowers that person, making it possible to accept challenges that assist us with developing self-control.

Nonetheless, it is important that an ample amount of rest be taken to effectively apply self-control in life. An individual should find ways to relax in their own way that best suit their personality and needs.

It may be by listening to music, exercising, and other things that boost one’s energy levels. This will make it easy for the individual to accomplish his task.

It may help to take breaks in between and relax to reduce stress and improve your productivity.

The moment of pause is indeed very helpful.

Self-awareness is the foremost aspect that needs to be dealt with for successful self-control. This means that one should first analyze one’s own personality and figure out his strengths and weaknesses.

After this, you should try to resist the temptations that he faces in life in relation to his weaknesses.

This is to say that if one loves ice cream and is used to having it every day, then one should make efforts to limit it to twice a week.

This is how a person strengthens and develops strong willpower, thereby contributing to self-development.

So, it is safe to say that self-control is actually the willingness to reject one’s own temptation to do a particular thing or task. This brings us to the next aspect of self-control, particularly strong willpower.

Your willpower makes you make a serious decision to complete a task. Many of you have the tendency to make up your mind for a mission, but due to your laziness or perhaps your desire for other comforts, you were not able to abide by it.

The most common example of this is exercising in the morning, which we usually give up because we do not want to sacrifice our sleep. This is where we actually understand the essence of strong willpower.

A person with strong willpower will give up his comforts and establish his mission. This will power generally reduces in stressful conditions.

Last but not least is the aspect of self-discipline. All three aspects of self-control are, however, interlinked. But each of them has a separate role to play. Self-discipline refers to fighting with one’s own feelings.

In this, one has to discover the actual cause of one’s temptation and consciously negate it by getting involved in other interesting activities. This will, in turn, develop strong willpower. Analyzing the consequences of one’s actions in the future will also help in reducing the urge for temptation.

An optimistic approach to life will surely take an individual on the path of success, as when an individual thinks positively, he will have a healthy body and thereby be able to accomplish his tasks in a better way.

Thus, self-awareness, strong willpower, and self-discipline together lead to effective self-control and further self-development.

Self-Mastery Skills and Taking Control

How to use your self-mastering skills to be able to get what you want

When it comes to using your self-mastering skills, you have to know what you want to change.

Sometimes, to learn your self-mastering skills, you have to work at them as well as try to figure out how and when to use them.

If you want to change an old habit that is unhealthy for you, then you’re going to have to really do some work.

Although it can be done, all you have to do is put some willpower into it and begin the change.

What do I have to do if I want to change something about myself?

When you want to change something about yourself, you’re going to have to do something about it.

This will have to be something like deciding how you want to make the change; for example, if you’re an overeater and want to change that to something positive.

This is when you’re overeating. You’re going to have to pull away and go somewhere else other than eating.

Like making an old habit turn to good, you can do this by figuring out what you want to do instead of eating. This may lead you to want to walk when you get the urge to eat.

Alternatively, maybe you will want to get into a good book; doing something other than eating will help you, and this is called using your self-mastering skills.

What other tools are there that I can use to help me?

There are many tools that will help you to be able to help yourself. You just have to be able to find the one that fits you best.

They have meditation, which is a good tool to use when you want to learn how to use your self-mastering skills.

Meditation is a skill that will help you learn how to relax your mind and soul while at the same time making it easy for you to relax enough to be able to analyze what you need to.

When you want to know or learn about meditation, you should do some research on it. There is a lot of research out there to help you learn as well as teach you the technique.

This technique has been used for many years to help control one emotion. There are many people today who are still using this skill to be able to maintain this world.

Times are getting hard, and I feel that everyone should have some way to be able to escape, to be able to find time and space for themselves, and this is what meditation will do for you.

Where would one find information on meditation?

When you want to find the history of mediation, you might want to go to the internet and do some searching there.

The internet is a good place to start. The reason for that is it has a huge range of information that will help you understand what it can do for you.

If you’re not able to use the internet for some reason, you can also visit your local library; they have information as well. The information that they have is good too.

Once you have decided that you want to get into this more, most cities’ offer some kind of support class or group that might be of some help to you. Just remember that the key word for this is willpower.

The Value of Self-Discipline in Life

The Temptation to Live an Undisciplined Life

In today’s society, you live in a world where temptations are everywhere. You have TV, video games, and sports to ensure you never get bored.

So is it any wonder that people struggle to focus on their schoolwork, their jobs, or their relationships? After all, why should you do something that is boring or hard when you can do something that’s easy and fun instead?

Well, the reality is that you don’t have to do boring stuff and work hard; no one is forcing you to do that. If you choose not to do these things, it is very likely that your school grades, job, or relationships will suffer as a result.

Why? Because the things that are worth having in life—the things that have real long-term value and meaning—are often the things that require time, effort, and hard work.

But if we live in a society that makes having fun so easy, how can we focus on obtaining the things that really matter in life when temptations make it so easy to do otherwise?

Self-Discipline in Life

The answer to this question is self-discipline. Discipline is the ability to force yourself to do something that you know you must do, even if you don’t feel like it.

In other words, discipline allows a person to resist the temptation of TV, video games, and sports.

Thereby allowing them to concentrate on their schoolwork, jobs, and relationships. They are the things that really matter and add value to your life.

At the risk of sounding like a bore, I don’t mean to say that discipline means you can’t have fun in life. No, that would be silly.

You need time for fun and entertainment, but there must be a balance; otherwise, you will most likely fail to succeed in life.

This is the reason self-discipline is so important in life, especially in today’s society, which is constantly tempting us to choose the easy way out.


Self-discipline starts with the ability to control your behavior. That means motivating yourself to do what you need to do and stopping yourself from doing things that are bad for you.

The “ability to control” is just the start, though, and real discipline is when you have trained your mind in such a way that you consistently get the behavior you want.

Discipline may appear to be a problem of willpower. However, this implies just pushing ourselves harder to do things, even when we feel miserable or are fighting temptations.

It’s a good recipe for stress and disappointment, but there are better ways to live a disciplined life.

Developing Self-Discipline

While practicing self-discipline may require lots of hard work and a strong will to master, eventually, the more you discipline yourself to resist succumbing to the temptations of life, the more your self-discipline will strengthen. In turn, this makes it easier to apply discipline in the future.

So developing self-discipline is just like any other skill in life. At first, it will be hard, but the more you practice, the stronger and easier it will become.

In a world that is made up of largely undisciplined and lazy people (especially those living in developed countries), having strong self-discipline will give you an enormous advantage in life.

Self-Discipline Tips

Have you ever stayed up all night talking about something interesting? Then you will know what power the mind has over the body.

Sleep can be put off when you are motivated by a passionate discussion, and it doesn’t take much willpower to keep doing something when you are enjoying it. That gives us a key to self-discipline.

Try to enjoy what you are doing and be energized. Your willpower goes up and down with your energy levels, so play energetic music, move around, laugh, and look for the interesting parts of whatever project you are working on.

Once you identify your best energy boosters and motivators, make a list and train your brain to use them whenever you need discipline.

Make things easier on yourself. If you feel stressed when you think about doing your tax return, for example, don’t think about it! Just lay out the forms where you can work on them later. Later, do just one form, and then another.

Whatever the task at hand, you can find enough motivation for some small steps. Start training your mind to take that step as soon as you think of it, and the next steps will become easier.

Self-Discipline and Self-Awareness

What if that cake calls to you? Sometimes it’s hard to resist temptation, right? Willpower is a nice idea, but here is a simpler solution: stop standing in front of the cake!

It is an easy lesson to understand, so train yourself to apply it habitually. Don’t keep beer in the house if you don’t want to drink it.

Don’t go alone to the bar if you want to maintain a faithful marriage. Just stay away from people who lead you into trouble.

Discipline doesn’t mean being immune to temptation. Go ahead and develop the willpower to say no, if you can, but why not also have the wisdom to avoid temptation?

Know where your resistance is low, and don’t put yourself in those situations. Does this make more sense than fighting useless battles with yourself?

Fighting feelings is a losing battle. It’s far more effective to learn about yourself. How are you energized and motivated? Where are your strengths and weaknesses?

Learn about yourself, and start using what you learn to make the behaviors you want easy. That’s the key to self-discipline.



How To Stay Motivated To Reach Your Goals?

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A lot of individuals are guilty of attempting to undertake their goals utilizing a series of trial and error approaches.

They arbitrarily throw their energy out there with all their might on the few steps they acknowledge, believing that this will get them to their destination.

They handle their goals in a hit-or-miss approach, and then hope that everything will turn for the better ultimately.

Although it might work in the short-term and on littler goals, it doesn’t work with huge, long-run goals.

For instance, you might get away with dropping off 5 lbs. of weight by simply eating less and working out more, but to drop off additional weight and sustain that weight loss calls for proper strategy.

staying motivated

The Basics

A lot of individuals have this misconceived notion of goal accomplishment as they only come into contact with the events of others’ goals.

They’re not tangled in all the thought-processes, intricacies and literal planning that went into the accomplishment of those goals.

Have a look at Olympians. They don’t win their medals because they merely blindly train daily. There are a lot of things that happen behind the scenes, like training by the most beneficial coaches, suitable diets, self-help courses to put them in the correct mindset, studying the correct techniques, and so forth.

Microsoft didn’t get to where it is today because of luck. It was by conscious strategizing and preparation that allowed the company to carve its particular niche in the market.

Stay Motivated

Motivation makes you feel as though you’re full of life and ready to accomplish anything you have to in order to accomplish the goals that you’ve set for yourself.

Motivation…we’re all giving chase to it, but few of us comprehend it, or why we lose it first of all.

What is implied by motivation?

Motivation is the innate desire to accomplish a goal, blended with the passion and vitality to work towards accomplishing that goal.

People who are motivated have a want to take on fresh ventures and satisfy the requirements essential to finish the undertaking.

Motivation is a characteristic that we all need in order to accomplish anything in our lives.

Without motivation, we’d all merely give up at the slimmest inclination of hardship. Motivation is the initiator that inspires and encourages us to be our finest.

Somebody who’s motivated will do anything it takes to be successful in accomplishing their goals. Motivation may alter your life by inspiring you to get everything you wish out of life, regardless what others try to tell you.

It’s possible for somebody who’s stricken by poverty to become motivated and turn everything around into a life of abundance.

Motivation provides us the passion that we require to start exploring our options in life as well as the bravery to see these aspirations through to reality.

If you’re distressed with your present situation, it’s most likely due to the fact that your present situation doesn’t motivate you.

You have to take it upon yourself to determine what it is that you really want out of life. Consider the type of life-style that you wish to lead and the sort of career you wish.

When you know what makes you happy and alter your life center, you’ll be excited to leap out of bed each morning.

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Why we drop off our motivation:

3 basic factors lead to the loss of our motivation, they are:

1. Deficiency of direction. You won’t be motivated to accomplish your goals if you don’t understand what those goals are.

2. Deficiency of self-confidence. Trusting you’ll fail is the best way to see to it.

3. Deficiency of focus. Not recognizing what it is that you wish will lead to wondering if you even wish anything at all.


Hints on how to remain motivated:

If you lack motivation, you likewise lack ambition, exuberance and zest. Motivations makes you feel as though you’re full of life and prepared to do anything you have to in order to accomplish the goals that you’ve set for yourself.

When you discover your motivation, you’ll be more pleased, you’ll have more vitality and you’ll be able to see the favorable results clearly in your brain.

You have to enhance the motivation inside you and waken your inner power to push yourself in the direction of accomplishing your aspirations, regardless how great or small they might be.

Here are a couple hints to help you discover your motivation and hang on to it:

1. Arrange goals. If you arrange goals for yourself, discovering the motivation to accomplish those goals will come easier.

2. Complete everything you begin. Make a promise to yourself that regardless what occurs, you have to always arrive at the finish line.

3. Unify with like minds. Favorable attitudes appear to be contagious. Encircle yourself with like-minded individuals who have the motivation that you seek.

4. Don’t postpone for tomorrow what you are able to get accomplished today. If you dilly-dally, you’ll get lazy, and lose all motivation to succeed.

5. Never quit. Patience and doggedness to keep going and remain strong regardless what comes along will provide you the motivation you require to succeed.

6. Perpetually remind yourself that you are able to win. Envision your goals and how pleased you’ll be when you’ve everything you wish.

7. Start with visualizing your future success and model the feelings you’ll experience when you achieve it.

8. Mentally walk the path towards this success and base your feelings at different milestones on the way.

9. Assign a high priority to each task that you must achieve which will give each task a priority in your mind.

10. Set a target for the amount of work you will do each day toward your goals.

11. Visualize the desired outcome: Create a picture of what the desired outcome will look like, and have this vision in your mind at all times.

12. Set milestones of the things you like to do and the things that you are good at.

13. Use visual indicators to monitor progress and complete the task.

14. Give yourself affirmations to remind yourself of how capable you are at reaching your goals.

15. Watch movies that motivate you.

16. Listen to music that motivates you.

17. If you work better with competition, make a deal with a friend or family member to compete for the goal for example who gets there first! It can be hypothetical and doesn’t necessarily have to be for real

18. Get help and support from people around you or from a professional in the field for example a personal trainer, finance manager and others.

19. Define your own version of success. Don’t let others define success for you.

20. Ignore any negative influences or responses to your efforts.

21. Make a conscious effort to do better than you have ever done in the past.

22. Focus on the positive achievements and not the negatives.

23. Share your successes with others as this will keep you focused and help you voice your accomplishments which will realize your achievements for you.

24. Acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses and work on them both.

25. Train yourself to finish what you start by refusing to quit until you are done.

26. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes and don’t punish yourself for making them. Express your goals in a positive way. That is a key component to setting goals that you can attain.

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How To Overcome Negative Thoughts To Boost Self Esteem?

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Are you looking for ways to boost your self-esteem? Then, how about going back to the way you think? Are your thoughts mostly positive or negative? With that, let’s find out how to overcome those negative thoughts.

Dispel Fears for a More Positive Outlook

Fears and phobias are something which can have an effect on anyone to some extent, while many can conquer their fear and most fears and phobias are unlike more than actual phobias.

For some people, fear and phobia can be severely distressing and have a huge impact on their day-to-day living.

Fear and phobias obviously cause negativity and constant negativity gets you down, while some phobias and fear can be deep-seeded you can break the hold it has over you with time and help.

There are various methods of help, and the more deeply seeded the fear or phobia, the more likely professional help may be advised in the form of a therapy or hypnotherapy. If the fear is only mild then you may overcome it by using self-help methods.

Understanding Fears and Phobias

In order to be able to conquer fears and phobias it is essential that you understand them, fear and phobia simply causes us uncomfortable thoughts and feelings when placed in certain situations.

It can bring feelings such as nausea, vomiting, dizziness, a terrible feeling, a tight band of pressure around the head, pains in the chest, a feeling of breathlessness and trembling.

These are all feelings that you yourselves allow building up and taking over your mind and body. Dispelling fear is a matter of taking back control and putting things into perspective.

This is the basis behind curing any form of fear or phobia although if you suffered for many years it will take longer for you to recover, recovery is possible.

Phobias and fears are basically exaggerated anxiety, and learning methods and ways to relax is a good start to curing fear and phobias.

There are many self-help books, online programs, courses and audio courses that can help you make a start, any self-help material designed for dealing with anxiety and stress will help but there are many specifically aimed at those suffering from fear and phobia.

Benefits of Overcoming the Fear

The benefits of dealing with and overcoming phobia and fear is immense and those who have recovered and overcome their fears and phobias have likened it to being reborn again, the world takes on new meaning when fears are dispelled.

A new positive outlook develops which leads to living a happier and more fulfilled life, you start to feel good about yourself and what you can accomplish in life, you are finally free to do anything and everything that your heart desires.

While there might still occasionally be some anxiety for a time when confronted by your fear or phobia, it will be unlike the intense fear that once had you incapacitated from it.

Once you have realized that the key to overcoming these feelings is inside you, the fear you feel doesn’t have the same hold on you it once did and will eventually give up its hold on you altogether.

Overcome Detachment

Dissociation or disconnection causes us problems with your emotions, physical sensations and how you feel about yourselves as well as the world around you.

It is often associated with depression and anxiety or when a person has gone through a traumatic experience.

People suffering from dissociation offer have feelings of unreality and often fear they are going insane or that they have some incurable illness.

Talking with and being around others becomes almost impossible and deep anxiety that is caused by the feelings can develop into a social phobia.

The feeling of dissociation can vary from person to person depending on the circumstances that brought it about, but common thoughts and feelings associated with disassociation include:

  • The world around feels unreal
  • Not belonging in the world
  • A grey fog covering their vision
  • Like having a veil over your head
  • The world is moving at a faster pace than normal
  • Confusion
  • A terrible feeling of not being able to cope
  • Unsure of yourself
  • Others find happiness but not you
  • Extreme anxiety
  • Feelings that everyone is against you
  • Feelings that everyone is talking about you

These are just some of the feelings caused by disassociation and these feelings eventually cause the sufferer to believe that they have to turn deeper inward to themselves in order to get back into reality.

They continually watch themselves for any brief glimpse that reality as they knew it is returning, of course the more they turn inward and worry the worse the symptoms are.

Cognitive behavioral therapy can help those suffering to overcome feelings of dissociation particularly when the cause is severe trauma.

Those suffering from dissociation due to anxiety and stress may be able to rid themselves of the feelings through self-help methods and the help and understanding of a doctor.

It is important to remember that the world hasn’t actually changed, it is only your perception of the world and those around you that has really changed and these are only temporary thoughts and feelings you are having.

Once you have conquered and overcome what is causing the feelings of dissociation you will see things as you once used to.

For those who suffer from feelings of dissociation due to depression and anxiety they should realize that the feelings are just that, no more than feelings and these feelings will leave in time.

It is important not to be constantly studying them and wondering when they will go, try to accept that they are here for a time and give them no more thought.

Once you have lost some interest in your feelings and are not constantly worrying about them it can be surprising how quickly the world once again becomes the world you once knew.

Accepting your feelings and any thoughts you might have during this period is essential, for it is only when you lose fear of the situation can you recover.


Overcome Doubt

Overcoming doubt is easy, if you don’t doubt it, of course.  However, many entertain an element of doubt in their minds about being successful whenever they try something new.

In fact, almost everyone is in some way plagued with doubt of some kind.  Take science, for example.

Do you think all the scientific advancement achieved would have been possible without questioning the prevailing assumptions at the beginning?

Suppose you want to start a business or launch a novel project. Are you absolutely sure that it will succeed?

There is always a little fear or doubt at the beginning.

Despite your doubt, you cannot let it keep you from your ultimate goal. The reason is simple. You must be prepared to risk failure because it is important for overcoming doubt.

Dive right in to whatever it is without making rash decisions.  Don’t worry, you won’t dive in without the right gear.

You will analyze all of the possible consequences of your situation and you will embrace the outcome, whatever it may be.  This is the secret to conquering doubt.  Have courage to fight it out and you are sure to defeat it.

Belief is the enemy of doubt. Learn to think positively and believe in your ability to be successful. Remember you will succeed if you think you will and you will fail if you think that too.

Your thoughts are self-fulfilling prophecies so you must stop thinking negatively. Likewise, never pay heed to the people who discourage you, who revel in planting doubts in you and who are actually wolves in sheep’s clothing.

Always be in the company of those people whose thoughts and attitudes to life in general are positive.

When Failure Strikes

You probably won’t be fortunate to never experience failure in your life.  However, you must understand that it is part of life.  These are the times when failure fills your mind with doubt and it is hard to muster the confidence you built up earlier in the process.

You can’t let go of your commitment, no matter how shaken you are by failure.  In fact, any setback should only prompt you to double your resolve to make another attempt at reaching your goal.

In order for this to happen, train your mind to build your self-control and self-confidence.  Every step towards self-confidence helps get rid of doubt and you will be back to your successful ways once again.

Healthy Doubt

Remember some amount of doubt can always be helpful in gaining wisdom or achieving advancement in life.

But when it becomes a cause for your depression and inactivity or when it stands like an insurmountable hurdle in your way to reach your destination, draw upon your energy reserves that can toughen up your mind.

You have to strengthen your will to succeed at all costs and weaken doubt by all possible means, so that you will lead a life of fulfillment.

You may succeed because of your doubt or in spite of your doubt. Or, you may have to accept the inevitable and compromise with whatever worst-case scenario that presents itself.

If this happens, just change course, re-energize your cylinders and start afresh on your revised path. Defeat doubt before it defeats you.

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Overcome Feelings of Helplessness

We all come across feelings of helplessness to some degree or another sometime during our life, this is fine as long as we get back on track and overcome these feelings.

However for some, feelings of helplessness set in and begin to affect our way of thinking and life.

Here are some helpful tips to help you understand those feelings of helplessness and how to overcome them.

  • Begin by identifying the problems, fears, issues and obstacles which make you feel helpless and try to discover why they make you feel this way
  • Work on ways that encourage you to take on new beliefs that you can be independent, self-confident and are capable of dealing with anything that crops up in the future
  • Learn ways to deal with these feelings of helplessness when they crop up
  • Practice ways to deal with conflicts and problem solving when they arise
  • If you have relapse and begin to doubt again remember that this is only normal and pick back up from where you left off
  • Whatever the success however small be sure to reward yourself
  • Realize that it will take time to change our feelings of helplessness so always strive towards your goals.
  • Don’t aim for perfection all the time, no one is perfect we all make mistakes
  • Identify what you need to do to grow in the skills of self-coping, self-healing and self-confidence

Feelings of helplessness can cause us many problems in life, the longer you feel helpless, the less control you have over your own life.

Here are some common experiences that occur through helplessness.

  • You begin to feel that no matter what you do or how hard you try you cannot succeed in life
  • You become over dependent on others around you to help you overcome your problems
  • You see yourself as totally incompetent
  • You develop a deep seated fear that you are unable to handle a situation
  • You become miserable, unhappy in life and depression sets in
  • You think of yourself as a victim that always needs rescuing from situations
  • You have a pessimistic outlook on life in general
  • You are afraid others see you as being frail and weak
  • You become despondent because you run out of people who are willing to look after you by solving your problems
  • You resign yourself to the fact that you will always be helpless, that you cannot possibly change

There are many ways you can help yourself overcome these feelings, the important thing to remember is that you are not alone and you can take back control over your life and make important decisions again to successfully solve your problems.

All you need is to have faith in yourself and dig deep and find that faith and bring it to the surface.

While we all have the ability to overcome our problems ourselves, it doesn’t hurt to get advice from friends and relatives as long as you aren’t relying on them totally to solve your problems for you.



Dispel Fears For A More Positive Outlook
Understanding Fears And Phobias
Phobias and fears are basically exaggerated anxiety, and learning methods and ways to relax is a good start to curing fear and phobias.

Benefits Of Overcoming The Fear
– likened to being born again
– new positive outlook
– start to feel good
– free to do anything and everything

Overcome Detachment or Dissociation
Detachment or dissociation is often associated with depression and anxiety or when a person has gone through a traumatic experience.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Remember that the world hasn’t actually changed
Overcome the cause
Accept your feelings and any thoughts

Overcome Doubt
– be prepared to risk failure
– dive in to whatever it is without making rash decisions
– have the courage to fight it out
– belief is the enemy of doubt

When Failure Strikes
– understand failures as part of life
– you can’t let go of your commitment
– train your mind to build your self-control and self-confidence

Healthy Doubt
– strengthen your will to succeed
– accept the inevitable
– compromise with whatever worst-case scenario

Overcome Feelings Of Helplessness
– take back control over your life
– make important decisions again to successfully solve your problems
– have faith in yourself
– dig deep
– find that faith



Do you have any negative thoughts? If so, what are they?

How do you overcome these negative thoughts?

How will you overcome fears?

How will you overcome detachment?

How will you overcome doubt?

How will you overcome feelings of helplessness?



How To Be Genuinely Happy?

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Genuine Happiness Comes from Within

Life isn’t the sweetest candy. Sometimes, when I feel like the world is just too heavy, look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives.

And then thoughts come popping into my mind like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?”

Then I pause and observed for a while… I figured out that maybe, they start to work on a place called ‘self’.

How does one become genuinely happy? Step one is to love yourself.

A professor once said that “loving means accepting.”  To love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve your repertoire to recover from our mistakes.

Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you know the answer to the question “how to be genuinely happy.”

When we discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else.

But if you keep questioning life lit it has never done you any good, you will never be able to find genuine happiness.

Life is about finding out about right and wrong, trying and failing, winning and losing. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale.

Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy.

How to be genuinely happy in spite all these? I tell you… every time you exert effort to improve the quality of life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, fail on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.

Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points.

Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”

Instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.

Genuine happiness isn’t about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota.

Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life doesn’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or not even the best.

How do you become genuinely happy?  Everyone has his own definition of ‘happiness’. Happiness for a writer may mean launching as much bestselling books as possible.


Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean a lot of money.

Happiness for a business man may mean success.

So, really now, how do we become genuinely happy? Simple. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. It’s about doing and making the best out of every single thing.

When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling yourself “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, you carry with you a flame of strong will power to persevere that may spread out like a brush fire. You possess a willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.

When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults. You pass step 1 in the project “how to become genuinely happy”. For as long as you know how to accept others, you will also be accepted.

For as long as you love and know how to love, you will receive love ten folds back.

Again, throw me that same question “how to become genuinely happy?” I’ll refer you to a friend of mine who strongly quoted- “Most of us know that laughter is the best medicine to life’s aches and pain. But most of us don’t know that the best kind of laughter is laughter over self. Coz then you don’t just become happy… you become free.”


Be happy…Happy as You Want to Be

Almost everyone have heard the hit single ‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby Mcferiin’s simple message surely made a lot of people by telling them not to worry.

Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is wonderful, and is also good for your health.

Being happy actually protects you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer and stroke.

One of the better things ever said is – ‘The only thing in life that will always remain the same is change’, and in our life we have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to.

Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find solace in the knowledge that it too would change.

Social networks or relationships are essential to happiness. People are different, accept people for who or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments.

If arguments seem unavoidable still try and make an effort to understand the situation and you might just get along with well with

Happiness is actually found in everyone, increasing it is a way to make a life more wonderful and also more healthy.

To be happy is relatively easy. Just decide to be a happy person. Abraham Lincoln observed that most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook to be. The choice is simple really, choose to be happy.

There are several ways by which you can do this.

Being grateful is a great attitude.  We have so much to be thankful for. Thank the taxi driver for bringing you home safely, thank the cook for a wonderful dinner and thank the guy who cleans your windows.

Also thank the mailman for bringing you your mails, thank the policeman for making your place safe and thank God for being alive.

News is stressful. Get less of it. Some people just can’t start their day without their daily dose of news. Try and think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do.

A religious connection is also recommended. Being part of a religious group with its singing, sacraments, chanting, prayers and meditations foster inner peace.

Manage your time. Time is invaluable and too important to waste. Time management can be viewed  as a list of rules that involves scheduling, setting goals, planning, creating lists of things to do and prioritizing.

These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine-tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.


Laugh and laugh heartily every day.  Heard a good joke? Tell your friends or family about it. As they also say -‘Laughter is the best medicine’.

Express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you. They will most likely reciprocate your actions.

Try not to keep pent up anger of frustrations, this is bad for your health. Instead find ways of expressing them in a way that will not cause more injury or hurt to anyone.

Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction. It gives a feeling of being competent in finishing our tasks.

Accomplishments are necessary for all of us and they give us a sense of value. Work on things that you feel worthy of your time.

Learning is a joyful exercise. Try and learn something new every day.  Learning also makes us expand and broaden our horizons and could also give us more opportunities in the future.

Run, jog, walk and do other things that your body was made for. Feel alive.

Avoid exposure to negative elements like loud noises, toxins and hazardous places.

These are the few simple things you can do every day to be happy.

And always remember the quote from Abraham Lincoln, he says that, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”



Genuine happiness comes from within

  • acceptance
  • contentment
  • exert effort to improve the quality of life
  • doing an making the best out of every single thing
  • willingness to stand up again and try
  • accept yourself and your own faults

Be Happy…Happy As You Want To Be

Choose to be happy!

  • Being grateful is a great attitude.
  • News is stressful. Get less of it.
  • A religious connection is also recommended.
  • Manage your time.
  • Laugh and laugh heartily every day.
  • Express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you.
  • Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction.
  • Learning is a joyful exercise.
  • Feel alive.
  • Avoid exposure to negative elements.


– What makes you happy?

– What makes you genuinely happy?

– What are your attitudes that contributes to your happiness?

– Do you choose to be happy?

– Are you depending your happiness from other people and circumstances?

– Does your happiness comes from within or from external circumstances?



How Can Keeping A Journal Help You Succeed?

how keep journal_c

You should never underestimate the power of keeping a written journal. There are many ways in which a journal can help you to better succeed in life.

You can use it to help yourself associate your feelings with your thoughts and your thoughts with your feelings and this is what is most important in order to succeed in life.

Your journal can help you to find out what motivates you in life, develop new skills, learn new strategies for dealing with life in general, write down ideas and plan them through and find out more about the person you are by asking questions of yourself and writing down answers to those questions.

A journal is an essential tool when it comes to learning about yourself and if you want to be a success in life, and knowing about yourself is a must.

While you may think, you know yourself, very few of actually do.  By keeping a journal, you may begin to realize all the little things you do not truly know or understand about yourself.

Develop Your Intuition

Your own intuition is your greatest asset and if more people developed an ear to listening to what we are actually saying inside then more of us would know the way to go and how to successfully achieve what it is we want out of life, simply by following our own inner guidance.

Your own personal journal can be a great way of developing your intuition and listening to yourself and what lies within you, record all the little things that you might let pass you by, such as flashes of inspiration, premonitions or hunches about something, basically anything that your intuition is telling you.

Keeping a journal is essential because inspiration can strike at any time, some of the greatest inventors and thinkers kept journals including one of the most prolific inventors in history, Thomas Edison.

One of the most helpful things a journal does is give us the ability to look back on records and refer to them.

For example if you encountered a problem and overcame it in the past and a similar problem crops up then you can reflect back and apply the same solution or adapt it for a more positive outcome.

Your journal can remind you of past achievements and this goes a long way to building self-confidence and helping you succeed in life when things get tough and can help comfort you.


Learn From The Past

A technique which is very popular and one which keeping a journal can help you accomplish is the “best-better” technique.

This technique can be applied to any situation that crops up in life and simply relies on you looking back on the situation and finding what you liked about it or what you experienced from it and then deciding how you could do better next time or how you could have better experienced from it.

The key to recovering from past mistakes and succeeding in the future is to learn from your mistakes but remember to focus on your strong points rather than your weak ones.

If you concentrate more on your weak points rather than your strong ones then very often this leads to you unconsciously reinforcing them which then lead to low self-esteem and of course having a low self-esteem isn’t positive.

It is only by building on your strengths can you increase your self-esteem and your self-esteem is the crucial factor to understanding your weaknesses and correcting them and therefore building a positive outlook on life which greatly increases your chances of success.

By noting down your experiences in your journal you are able to look back on them and gain a clearer understanding of yourself and how you feel which ultimately determines how you think and how you think determines how successful you are in life.


Benefits Of Journal Writing

The benefits of journal writing are fairly well established due to the long history of journal writing. From Anne Frank to Di Vinci, journal writing has proven itself.

When considering the benefits of journal writing, it is important to set a few parameters. First, there is no age limit to using journals. There are distinct benefits for children of all ages, but journal writing is equally valuable to adults.

The reason for this is journal writing is an act of personal reflection. Whether it is a teenager reflecting on the social nightmare of high school or an overworked parent taking twenty minutes a night to write is irrelevant.

The point is, all age groups benefit from stepping back from their life for a few moments and reflecting on things.

Whether you recognize it or not, journal writing provides you with an anchor in your daily life. In the journal, you are free to write what you want without restrictions, to truly address the issues in your life without fear of criticism.

Put another way, one of the benefits of journal writing is it acts as a self-help psychiatrist, but for MUCH cheaper!

As you write in your journal over time, you’ll also start to ascertain a second benefit to doing so. This benefit is one of self-criticism.

Inevitably, you’ll read through past entries and review your life. Doing so will lead you to self-reflection as well as thoughts on how you might act differently should certain situations rise again.

Of equal importance, journal writing has health benefits. Before you click away from this article, consider a time in your life when you were extremely frustrated. Hopefully, you spoke to a friend to “get things off your chest.” Didn’t you feel a lot better afterwards?

Getting things off your chest helps relieve stress, one of the biggest killers in our modern society. Journal writing acts in much the same way since you are able to write your thoughts without fear of criticism.

There are other benefits to journal writing, but all boil down to one simple fact. Writing in a journal allows you to express yourself without being judged. With the lack of privacy in our modern, digital world, that is hardly a small benefit.

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Benefits Of A Good Training Journal

Most of us have trained at one part in our lives. Chances are if you’ve ever taken your training seriously you’ve used a training journal or a training log.

The main difference between training journals and training logs, is what you document in them after each workout or day, etc. Training journals are just that. They are more of a journal rather than a log.

They will normally include things like mental health and how you felt during the day or your workout. They can reach a bit into some statistical information but this is normally saved for a training log.

Training logs are generally created of off some kind of a template. For example, every day you fill out a form that has the same fields. Things like current weight, daily workout, diet information, are all things that can be put in a Training Log on a day to day basis.

Both journaling and logging are important to keep an effective history of your past. For convenience sake it’s nice to have two combined together in some way. This way it’s always easy to remember to do both.

Benefits Of Recording Your Training

The number one benefit of recoding your training is to have a detailed history to look back on. This can be very useful in times of planning.

For example, to figure out what has worked for you and what hasn’t. It’s very useful for figuring out reasons for injuries or for times of burnout.

Have you ever sat down and tried to plan out training with nothing to work with? If you have something to look back upon a detailed account of what you’ve done over the past few weeks it’s easy to plan ahead, and to effectively increase your workout intensity, and so on to improve for the future.

A detailed journal is also really nice to have just for personal use, and to be able to look back on past months and years, to remember different accounts.

journal writing

Gratitude Journal

Keeping a gratitude journal can be a key part of living a happy and prosperous life.

How so? Acknowledging all the things, events, and people we appreciate will quickly get us out of the “whining” mode and right into “happy” mode, increasing our vibration. And with that, we’ll begin to draw more of the things we’re already happy about.

Ever notice how your days go from bad to worse as you grumble and resent all the things in your life that make you miserable – or that you THINK make you miserable.

We won’t get into justifications here. It’s clear enough that if you think enough about them, that’s where you’ll stay, and that’s what you’ll keep getting.

So what if somebody else had a hand in it? Do you really want to give them the satisfaction of successfully making you miserable too?

You can turn things around. Express appreciation. In writing. For the unlikeliest things. The only condition: you must find a way, anyway, to actually feel some appreciation.

But it doesn’t just have to be challenges. Sometimes the simple things, the things that we normally take for granted, work just as well as objects of our appreciation.

Did you have a good meal today? Or yesterday? Are there people in your life who would miss you if you were gone? People you would miss? Express gratitude.

Can you see? Hear? Walk? Talk? Express gratitude. Is today a beautiful day? Did the sun appear when it was supposed to? Express gratitude.

Do you own or have access to something, anything, you enjoy? A book, a CD, a piece of clothing or jewelry (no fancy metals and minerals required)? Express gratitude.

Chances are there are many things that deserve to be written into your gratitude journal. And why write them down?

There’s something about the writing process that makes things so much more real. You’ve probably read all about the power of written-down goals.

Well, gratitude, especially as a path towards greater prosperity and abundance, works the same way.

Then watch what happens. Your vibrations will go up. You’ll feel happier. Things start working better. Maybe some new signs of prosperity come very quickly, maybe they’ll take a while.

Either way, you can be assured that as long as you keep grumbling, you’ll keep swatting any incoming signs of prosperity away like flies. So stop grumbling and welcome all the good that’ll be flowing into your life.


how keeping a journal_q


How To Have More Passion In Life?

have more passion

About Passion In Life

A lot of us meander through life not truly recognizing what we were meant to accomplish.

Rather than coasting through life without placing your finger on how to discover your passion in this world, attempt to pinpoint what that passion is.

In order for your life to enlarge, your brain needs to expand. Simply like with exercising, once you urge your muscles, they grow.

It’s the same with your brain. Once you think or try fresh things, your brain expands. And an extended brain is an enriched brain. You become enriched, and so does your life story.

It may lead to passion in life, an extroverted personality; you meet fresh interesting individuals, try fresh fun things, and build self-assurance and self-regard, which all bring you happiness and meaning in life.

So, here are some ways to have more passion in your life.

Attend to yourself. When you start paying attention to your body, and its well-being, things will come to you.

By standing up off the sofa and running or walking on a day-to-day basis, it may get your blood pumping and your brain working. Pay attention to your ideas as you work out, and a few invigorating things might pop up.

Take heed with your inner child. If there was a huge dream you held onto while growing up, attempt and determine why you relinquished it. As youngsters we have no obligations, and that leads us to daydream.

As we become older, a few of these daydreams get put on the back burner for grownup obligations. They may be brought to the forefront again.

Look for help. Your acquaintances and loved ones will be able to help you recognize what you are great at, and what a few of your hopes and aspirations are. By connecting to these individuals, and requesting direction, you might discover answers.

Put down ideas. Writing may be a great way to see on paper a recurring theme(s). Finding out a secret wish or goal may be hard, however if you really listen to what your joys are, you may simply discover a passion in life.

Volunteer to work. By stepping outside of yourself, and assisting other people, you may recover some of the joy that you seek.

Assisting the elderly may be an awesome way to hear about their marvelous lives and may spark off an interest that you don’t presently think about. It may be hard to discover a passion in life, however never quit trying.

Get going. Once you have a few thoughts that interest you, get out and attempt to get moving in a new career or interest.

By taking classes, or internships or a new job, you may discover out if what you are really passionate about.

There are a lot of factors which may play into your success at touching base with your inner passion and originative thinking. The want to discover precisely what you wish from your life is just the opening move.

enjoy nature_rid of stress

Your Surroundings

Working out how to dig out those long entombed passions and interests is a different story.

If you’re setting about the job of producing a vision board you might discover yourself taking steps that will open you up mentally and let you relax and feel originative in order to discover those inner wants.

Meditation, music, and pictures may inspire you once you start your vision board. However, a different thing that you might not have thought about is your surroundings. Originative surroundings may inspire your passions.

Whether you’re most pleased in a neutral room with passive colors and décor or choose brilliant, vibrant items surrounding you, you may discover  what originative surrounding works better for inspiring you by doing some experimenting.

This is like trying out assorted kinds of music to determine which relaxes you most.

Inside and out you may take the time to sit in a couple of different spaces, encircled by different items to discover out what makes you experience something. Relaxation is great, but the urge to accomplish something is even greater.

Whether your environment makes you want to sing or take a photo, draw or compose or just sit and dream the idea is to discover the paragon place for you to connect with your inner self.

A few individuals connect with themselves while they’re unwinding while other people need some stimulant in order to stir their originative juices.

Regardless what kind of surroundings work for you the theme is to open your brain to all the possibilities and move into a place where you may see yourself working toward a goal of some kind.

Once you think of originative surroundings you might feel that in order to be originative you ought to be surrounded by artworks however originative environments aren’t only about the décor, it’s about how it makes you feel.

So if your originative place is sitting on a limb in the woods hearing the birds whistle, or in a window seat with sunshine streaming in, that’s fantastic. It’s all about you and how your place makes you feel.

Even if you are not making a vision board it’s crucial to spend some time in an originative place so that you may stay in touch with your inner passions and originative thinking. This conducts a more balanced mental attitude and less tension in your life.

Enjoy The Quiet And Be Present

Is school straining you ? Is work annoying you? We all have to have time to ourselves. Even if you’re not strained, taking time to be by yourself may be calming and rewarding.

Great Info

Make certain that everything else is in check. Even if you’re strained or tired, make sure that your house is orderly, so as not to let things prey on you beware while you’re enjoying a minute to yourself.

Climb in a bath.

  • As you fill the bathtub, add a few bubbles to the running water.
  • While waiting, read a magazine to pass the time.
  • Light a few scented candles.
  • Dim the lights and get into the tub.
  • Shut your eyes and unwind.
  • Free your brain of any worries. Remove yourself from the rest of the Earth for the next 30 minutes.

Unwind and enjoy yourself.

  • Prepare a pet snack. Enjoy a relaxing herb tea.
  • Watch an old film.
  • Read a short story.
  • Take a long snooze.
  • Do zip.

Living with your mind centered on the future causes you to miss out on the here and now and our lives are made out of seconds of now, not of seconds of the future. By living in the future you don’t really live at all.

Naturally, it’d be nice to live so I’m trying to love the journey – the present. Here are a few ways to accomplish that:

Pure centering is bliss. When your thoughts, behaviors and emotions are all directed toward an individual function you’re centering and you’re in the present.

build self-confidence

You ought to get lost in your work. Set a deadline for yourself to complete a task and see your level of centering skyrocket.

Time flies. Find like-minded people and put your heads together.

Being in a hurry doesn’t give you an opportunity to appreciate the present. I realize there are assorted apparent urgencies you might feel in your life. I find taking things slower and merely being patient more rewarding.

Slow down the speed of life.

When you introduce balance into your life you get mindful of what you’re doing, giving you an opportunity to acknowledge seconds for what they are: precious gifts of chronology. Don’t let anything devour your life.

Realize what you want the future to hold and set a plan to oblige that. This gives you perhaps the most potent tool in accomplishment: certainty.

Wrapping Up

If you trust in something, are passionate about it and may see the end result so clearly that you may taste it, you feel certain that it’s inevitable. You’re no longer questioning if, but when. And this is powerful.

With this certainty you are able to quit stressing over what might or might not occur in the future because there’s merely no wondering – you’re going to accomplish it and that’s final. Accomplishment merely becomes a matter of doing X to accomplish Y.

This might seem like a cold way to approach life, however when the outcome Y is understood, every moment X may be fully appreciated as they aren’t bombarded by self-distrust or doubt. You may live in the present because your future becomes a predetermined (but still open to spontaneity) mass of wonder.

Set a direction for your life and love the ride.



In order for your life to enlarge, your brain needs to expand.
You become enriched, and so does your life story.

Ways to have more passion in life:

  • Attend to yourself.
  • Take heed with your inner child.
  • Look for help.
  • Put down ideas.
  • Voluntary work.
  • Get going.

Your Surroundings

  • Originative surroundings may inspire your passions.
  • Regardless what kind of surroundings work for you the theme is to open your brain to all the possibilities and move into a place where you may see yourself working toward a goal of some kind.

Enjoy the Quiet and Be Present

  • Climb in a bath
  • Unwind and enjoy yourself
  • Slow down the speed of life


– Are you passionate about life and living your life?

– What are your passions in life?

– Are you living these passions?

– Are you living in an environment fit for your passions?

– Are you creating an environment for yourself and your passions?



What Are The Consequences Of Your Reactions?


Once upon a time, a child complained to a loving father that life was miserable and that the child didn’t know how they were going to pull through.

The child was sick of battling and struggling all the time. It appeared just as one issue was worked out, a different one shortly followed.

The loving father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled up 3 pots with water and placed each on a high fire.

When the 3 pots started to boil, he put potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot, and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to the child.

The child groaned and impatiently waited, questioning what he was doing. After several minutes, he switched off the burners.

He took the potatoes out of the pot and put them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and put them in a bowl. He then ladled the coffee out and put it in a cup.

Addressing the child, he asked, “Child, what do you see?”

“Potatoes, eggs, and coffee,” the child hastily responded.

“Look closer”, he stated, “and touch the potatoes”. The child did and noticed that they were soft.

He then asked the child to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, the child noticed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, he asked the child to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a grin to the child’s face.

“Father, what does this mean?”

He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs, and coffee beans had each confronted the same hardship, the boiling water. However, each one responded differently.

The potato went in strong, hard and unforgiving, but in boiling water it got soft and weak.

The egg was fragile with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior till it was set in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg got hard.

However, the ground coffee beans were unparalleled. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they altered the water and produced something new.

“Which are you?” he asked his child. “When hardship knocks on your door, how do you react? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

In life, things occur around us and things happen to us, but the sole thing that truly matters is what occurs inside us.

Indeed, there are things that we might not understand at times but we can relate to them through simple illustrations like this.

There could be events in our life that we are not aware that we are drifting away unknown of the possible dangers that is on the way.

It is like relaxing in a boat on the river not knowing that it will fall down into a very deep waterfall.


And going back to the consequences of reactions, it doesn’t matter the scourge and trials you are into right now.

Again, how would you react to it?

How will you take it?

How will you create something out of it?

How would you want it to end?

Would you allow it to shape you or reshape you?

Would you let it develop you into a better version of yourself?

Would you let the fire purify or harness you?

What are the things that you can learn from all of these?

What are the other things that you have to learn in the process?

Why am I throwing a lot of questions now?

It is to stimulate you and make you think and ponder deeper.

In order to move you from your current way of thinking into something above it and beyond it.

Also, you cannot resolve the situation with the same way of thinking.

Transform Negative “Reactions” Into Positive “Pro-actions”


1. What happens when we let ourselves becomes dominated by negative responses to life, e.g. destructive behavior patterns, negative emotions, apathy, and so on?

We find ourselves getting “worked up,” often to the detriment of our own wellbeing as well as to those around us.

The result? We risk becoming increasingly angry and bitter about aspects of our life that we believe we have little or no control over.

The solution? To explore the reality behind these actions and emotions, and transform them into positive causes.


2. Are You?

– Too Easily “Affected” By Your Environment?

– Guilty Of Feeling Anger And/Or Resentment?

– Often Letting Yourself And Others Down As A Result?

Begin making the transformation today!


3. What’s In It for You?

– Discover the Reality behind These “Reactions”

– Develop Ways of Recognizing and Countering Them

– Master How to Transform Them into Positive and Proactive Causes


By learning to transform your negative “reactions” into positive “pro-actions”, you create a far healthier state of physical and emotional wellbeing for yourself and your environment.

In turn, you become increasingly capable and responsible as individuals, and when faced with greater challenges you automatically find yourself better equipped to deal with them and move on.

How do you achieve this?

Simple – first you have to acknowledge what it is that’s encouraging you to react in this way, and then turn it around so as to create something more positive.

For example, instead of reacting aggressively to a particular comment, you can learn to respond more appropriately by understanding what triggered that reaction coupled with its negative impact on yourself and your environment.

As soon as we’ve got to grips with the cause, you’re able to turn it on its head and understand what it is you need to be or do differently.

Another example: instead of responding with a defeatist, “I can’t do anything about it,” try saying, “I understand it’s been difficult in the past, but this time I’m going to look at alternatives.”

Result – in addition to becoming far happier and resilient in ourselves, you naturally radiate the benefits of such actions to others.


INQUIRY: Take a look back at some recent situations when you allowed yourself to react negatively or angrily. What triggered this behavior?

What were your emotions and feelings before, during and after?

Had you responded in a more proactive manner, what would you have done differently and what would have been the outcome?


ACTION: For the next thirty days, explore the reality that’s causing you to react negatively to your life and your environment.

Learn from the above and check in with any emotions and feelings. Get to grips with what it is you need to be and do differently and put it into action.

Notice the difference you create within yourself and those around you.


“Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment, and learn again to exercise his will – his personal responsibility.” – Albert Einstein



Start Early To Combat Low Self-Esteem

combat low self-esteem


Healthcare providers know that there are many reasons why people suffer from low self-esteem from the chemical imbalance to lack of faith, opportunities, discipline and more.


Many agree, though, that the number one cause of low self-esteem is due to lack of positive feedback and love given to children during their early years.


What happens all too often is that children are born before their parents have matured enough to focus more clearly on their own adulthood, family and family values in the race to succeed with a mate while both are working long hours.


They are still trying to learn good work and life ethics and morals while being out from under parental influence, plus learning about family life together and extended family members during those early years. It’s a lot all at once.


And often before the maturing adults realize they may be following in their own parent’s footsteps, they repeat similar mistakes done to them in their own childhoods.


For example, many parents simply do not let their children try and try again and make their own mistakes.


And many parents do not offer sincere praise and compliments to their children. Instead, taking them and their efforts for granted in all too often a difficult, tough world today full of challenges.


Another important factor is that children most often truly believe in their hearts that all adults are right, and set their own values and feedback systems by them.


However, unfortunately too many of these adults raising young children are still battling illegal substance abuse, gambling, alcohol abuse and other very important issues.


The results are that these adults are simply not doing what’s best for either themselves or their families, especially with their young children trying to follow along in their footsteps.


What a drug or alcohol abuser does not see, for instance, is the harmful physical, emotional and often other abuse passed along to the children as the adults get and stay too caught up in their own self-focus.


In short, children and adults of all ages do need positive feedback and people to demonstrate in a sincere manner their care and concern.


Start young and encourage your mate and children to make good, healthy, positive choices. And when they fail at something, offer them hope and encouragement to try and try again.


Also encourage education, regardless of the level you have. Too many adults often ‘say’ they want their children to success, yet negate comments all through childhood in areas of advancing education.


So do offer plenty of reading materials around the home, show by example and read yourself, encourage workshops, online classes, eBooks and more.


Try to point out and help guide children and mates in their areas of their strengths like subjects in school (chess, math, music…), hobbies (crafts, musical instruments, singing…) and service to others (volunteer work, part-time job).


Reach out and show positive feedback. And reach out with human love, care, and respect. You’ll gain in return, increasing your own self-esteem and love.


overcome low-self-esteem


Stop Underestimating Your Worth


It is important that you do not underestimate your worth, as you are what you think you are, self-esteem is all about thoughts and what you think of yourself.


If you think confidence then you will appear confident, and then this will show on the outside. When people realize their worth, they are able to face life with greater confidence and optimism about the future.


They are more likely to be able to reach their goals and gain experience, satisfaction and happiness from life, are better able to form lasting relationships that work and are better able to cope with whatever life throws at them.


A person who realizes their self-worth is a happy well-adjusted person who possesses the ability to cope with anything and anyone throughout their life and is capable of doing anything they set their mind on doing.


Problems caused by underestimating your self-worth


Many problems can occur in your life simply by underestimating your own self-worth.

A lack of self-worth:

  • affects your sense of well-being
  • causes problems with your feelings and needs
  • affects your ability to make good healthy choices in relationships, work and life in general
  • cause fears such as abandonment and problems such as people continually striving for perfection but never seeming to reach it


A lack of self-worth has been attributed to being indecisive, addictions such as smoking, drinking, drug abuse, compulsive shopping disorder and problems with eating such as bulimia and anorexia.


Realizing your self-worth


You are capable of realizing your self-worth. You do not have to do anything special in order to gain or deserve self-esteem.


The key to realizing your self-worth is getting that little voice inside your head to stop putting you down all the time, it is our own thoughts and feelings that drive us to develop a low self-esteem.


This little voice has developed over a long period of time, casting self-doubt onto yourselves until you genuinely believe that we aren’t worthy or capable.


It is your own minds that develop your feelings of low self-esteem, not some outside force.


There are several ways in which you can begin to change your pattern of thought and boost your self-esteem that in turn begins the process of realizing your true self-worth.


The basics behind making this correction are:

  • Learning to recognize self-critical thoughts and stopping them
  • Learning to replace self-thoughts with more positive ones
  • Sticking with the habit of correcting your negative thoughts with more positive ones


There are many ways in which you can begin to set the pattern of changed thoughts but perhaps the easiest one is using affirmations, which are simple positive statements and using these to replace any negative thoughts.


Examples of positive affirmations could be:

  • This is a new and exciting challenge – this could be used to replace thoughts such as this is too hard or I can’t do this it’s beyond me.
  • I am a confident, worthy individual – replace this when you have thoughts such as can I do this or I could never do this.
  • I can do anything my heart desires if I put my mind to it – this can be used to replace thoughts such as I’m not sure if I’m capable of completing this task or I don’t know if I can complete what is asked of me.


All of these are simple affirmations that you can use to gradually change the way you think, which in time will change the way you feel about yourself and encourage you to realize your true self-worth.




De-cluttering for Success


If you are surrounded by clutter and disorganization in your lives it makes an excellent breeding ground for negativity.


Negativity is what brings about feelings of low self-worth and low self-esteem which hinders us in life and is the basis for us being unsuccessful in what we choose to do.


It is essential therefore if you want to succeed and make the most out of life that you de-clutter from time to time and remove any excess obstacles and belongings from your path, keeping your lives open and free flowing.


Here are some simple points to remember to keep your home and life clutter free.


Replace old with new


This applies to anything which you bring into your home be it clothing, utensils, furniture or any other item.


If you continually buy and bring new items into your home then very quickly you are going to be overrun with items which usually end up being packed in cartons and put in the basement.


Even if you pack items and put them in the basement it is still clutter, clutter that you could do without. Thus, get into the habit of throwing things away or giving them to charity when you buy new.


Don’t keep unnecessary things


In order to keep your home clutter free it is essential that you don’t keep anything which is not essential, items belonging in this category include junk mail which appears through your letterbox, flyers, old newspapers, magazines, letters or trash from your car.


Letters that you don’t need can be shredded immediately, the same for junk mail, while any trash from your car should be collected daily and disposed of immediately.


It is surprising if you get into the habit how much junk you can eliminate building up in your home on a daily basis just by taking care with items such as this.


Throw anything away that you don’t like


Never hang onto items simply because you were given them as presents.

While this may sound harsh it leads to unnecessary clutter, if you don’t like something then don’t keep it, give it away to someone who likes it or sell it but don’t hang onto it.


Have a goal


When looking around your home have a goal in mind when de-cluttering, for example treat each room separately and say to yourself “I aim to de-clutter this room by 25%”.


If you start out with a clear goal in mind you will feel more in control, organized and feel you are accomplishing something.


You should divide the clutter into three piles, those items you can sell, the ones which are trash and those that you wish to give to charity, starting out with a clear plan and goal in mind makes de-cluttering your life so much easier.


Never procrastinate


Be harsh with yourself and don’t feel guilty about throwing something away or giving it away.


Once you start de-cluttering don’t give it a second thought and remove something from a pile and change your mind about getting rid out of sentiment.


If you stop and think about every item in this way it sows the seeds of doubt and negativity that leads to disorganization and a home full of items we don’t need.



How NLP Can Help You


Chances are that many of those who first come across NLP wonder what it is all about, even if it appears in the context of influencing human behavior through the adoption and practice of certain established techniques and procedures.


NLP stands for Neuro-linguistic Programming, where ‘neuro’ is something related to both mind and body.


Linguistic’ is about language patterns or structures and ‘programming’ is devising ways and means of coordinating mind, body, and language for shaping behavior so as to achieve better results than before in various walks of life.


In a sense, NLP can help you in many ways, if only you get to know its techniques and how to use them for your benefit.


Changed perceptions


You can turn to NLP when you are interested in developing your personality traits and characteristics, which determine your verbal and non-verbal reactions to the happenings in this world.


As a first step, let us understand that your perception of reality is based on your subjectivity. Just as a map is merely a miniature representation of a territory, what you perceive as real is only a colored representation of reality, not the reality itself.


You can’t help but look at the world through rose-colored glasses.  Your reactions are dictated not by the reality but by your view of that reality.

NLP helps you in realizing this and reducing, if not completely removing, your subjectivity.

You will then perhaps consider adopting alternative viewpoints of reality and, consequently, bringing about a shift in the way you react to it.


Why do people react differently to a particular event or situation?  Is it not because of the differences in their individual perceptions of that event or situation? What a traumatic event is to one may not be the same to another.


For instance, some people may take verbal or physical abuse lightly or simply ignore it.  Others may be so affected by it that they need psychological or medical treatment.


The underlying philosophy of NLP is based on the premise that it is possible to change one’s perceptions, beliefs and behavior so that traumatic experiences become possible to treat.  It is also possible that you might even become immune to trauma.


Get rid of phobias


You can similarly get rid of your phobias, if any, by going into the factors that cause your fear in the first place, with the help of NLP techniques.


You can perhaps look at things in the way that your adversaries do. You can perhaps consider the same things from a totally new perspective.


Another option, you can perhaps study people who have achieved excellence in any particular aspect of their life.

Find out what qualities and factors contributed to their success and then try and import the same or similar factors and qualities into your life in an effort to achieve excellence in your chosen field.


You can lower your levels of unhappiness or raise the levels of happiness by transforming your belief portfolio, your pre-conceived notions, your language patterns that display your innermost feelings, and your unconscious mind that exposes your conscious reactions to the external world, and so on.


In short, as the NLP practitioners claim, NLP transforms you into a new you, a happier you and a more effective you capable of dealing with this world in a much better way than before.


How Positive Thinking Manifest Change



You heard amazing stories of rags to riches stories, people who’ve turned their lives around and went from zero to hero.

Yet, even as you marvel at their success, perhaps, you never think that you are capable of such yourselves.


It is such negative thinking that keeps many at their low-paying jobs, stuck in their crappy little apartments and in their mediocre lives.


But, you can change your lives, simply by harnessing the power of your minds, specifically the power of positive thinking.


Like all things in life, learning to turn negative thoughts into positive ones will take time, but the process itself is really quite simple.


Stay fit and healthy.

A healthy mind needs a healthy body to reside in. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle is one the fundamental ways to stay positive without any psychological involvement.


Regular exercise is scientifically proven to elevate mood and reduce stress. A healthy diet is also essential – make sure you fuel your body with the right foods.


Use positive affirmations.

Many of us are our own worst enemies, constantly pulling ourselves down with negative self-talk. Encourage yourself with daily positive affirmations and drown out the voice of negativity.


Choose your company well.

Negativity, like positivity, is contagious. Surround yourself with positive people who support you and avoid those who sap your energy and motivation with their relentless negativity.



The simple act of smiling is physically proven to help you stay positive and make you more happy.

Allow yourself to be open to humor, share a laugh with a neighbor or smile at the cashier when she rings up your purchases. You’ll be surprised at how good it’ll make you feel.

And here are more tips to instill positive thinking in you.


positive thinking


7 Days Program to Positive Thinking


You have a bright idea hidden somewhere in the back of your mind that you just can’t wait to test out. Of course, you’re not the only one with the bright idea.


So what motivates you to churn those creative or even inspiring juices to its utmost flavor?


It’s always best to set up a personal goal where you can accomplish the most in record time, maybe like mowing the lawn in an hour before the big game on TV.

A correct and positive attitude in whatever you do will make things easier, and even enjoyable.


Here are some tips to make it through the week even if you’re just sitting in your favorite couch. An idea takes time to form in your head and is always at work while you are busy sitting.


Having a bit of positive thinking can help you realize things that are never thought possible.


1. Take passionate action towards living your life by design.


Talk is cheap. Action = deposits in the bank of a passionately authentic future. Without it, passion is void.


This is a perfect example where dreams are made of where you start by tinkering with your mind, then with your hands. And if the idea weakens, you can always go back to it later until you finish it.


2. Commit to yourself as well as those you love to create powerfully a life you can love.


Instead of reacting, commit to creating from your heart and soul, out of love rather than fear.

Your dream will always be there, but a dream will still be a dream without motion.

Be amazed as the transformation begins.


3. Recognize and embrace the thought that each moment is perfect regardless of its outcome.


Every time you hit on something that may appear too extreme, why not give it a shot and see if it will work.

You will be surprised to see that there are other ways to get the task done in time. If you are not pleased with the outcome, decide to use that moment to learn from and make the appropriate shift.


4. Dwell completely in a place of gratitude.


Learn to utilize what you have in your hands and make use of it in the most constructive way.

Slipping into neediness will become less of a habit when you repeatedly shift towards gratitude, away from poverty consciousness.


5. Use a Passion Formula of Recognize/Reevaluate/Restore in place of the Shoulda/Woulda/Coulda whirlwind.


The former is based in increased knowledge and abundance while the latter focuses on scarcity and lack.

As you face people or tasks that may seem harder than scaling the summit of the Himalayas, allow yourself to realize that the task is just as important as giving out orders to your subordinates.

You would rather be richly passionate!


6. Keep humor at the forefront of thought, laughing at and with yourself when possible.


You may find yourself quite entertaining when you loosen up! I am yet to see a comedian ever go hungry even though his jokes are as ‘old as great-grandma’.


Life has so much to offer to allow you to mope around in self-pity. Humor is very attractive, very passionate: life-giving.


7. Believe that you are the architect of your destiny.


No one can take your passionate future from you except for you! Create your life authentically. As long as there’s still breath in your body, there is no end to how much you can accomplish in a lifetime.


The concept of thinking big is all about enjoying your work, which would lead to celebrate a discovery that is born within your hands. Watch everything flow into place with perfect, passionate precision.


It’s interesting how people get wallowed up by something trivial as learning to use a computer when nowadays that top computer companies are manufacturing software that even the kids can do it.


This does not mean to be condescending, but that’s the idea of not having any positive thinking in your life. You’ll just end up as a dim bulb in a dark corner.


So, instead of subjecting yourself to what you will be doomed for, make your path by taking the first step with a positive attitude.


positive thinking


Tips for Positive Living

Positive thinking, self-growth, thinking yourself to success – so much has been said about these subjects, but is it really achievable?

The truth is that the power of our minds to influence our actions cannot be underestimated.


Not everybody believes or accepts the power of positive thinking. But there is an undeniable truth that negative thoughts, words, and attitudes bring up negative and unhappy moods and actions.


Negativity breeds more negativity, a vicious, never-ending cycle that can only lead to failure, frustration, and disappointment.


Conversely, positive thinking will do the exact opposite; positive thoughts can only beget positive actions, leading to a happier, healthier, more successful life.


So how do we move beyond positive thinking towards positive living? The first step is always to decide that you can be a more positive person.


Many people cannot even move beyond this first step, coming up with all sorts of excuses (“I’m stuck in a lousy job”, “I’m never going to have a successful long-term relationship”, etc.) as to why they cannot be more positive.


But, know this, no matter what your life is like, choosing to be more positive is entirely your choice to make.


Next, you need to commit 100% to the idea of positive thinking and positive living at all times. Now this is harder than simply choosing to be positive.


This commitment requires you to remain positive even when things seem to be going wrong in every possible way.


But the truth is that the most successful people are those who are able to commit and persevere and ultimately move beyond mere thinking towards the life they have always wanted.


Positive thinking requires commitment, persistence, and hard work.

But once you’ve trained your mind to habitually remove all negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones, you will find yourself in a better position to achieve the success, happiness and wealth you’ve always dreamt of.


positive living


Relish Life Alter Your View


In life, you’re always satiated with choices. You might opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you might choose to take the optimist’s route and take an ambitious and fulfilling life.

So why nourish an optimist’s viewpoint? And why today?


Optimism has been linked to favorable mood and great morale; to academic, athletic, armed services, occupational and political success; to fame; to healthiness and even to long life and freedom from injury.


Rates of depressive disorders and pessimism have never been greater. It affects grownups the same way it strikes younger individuals.


The average age of onset has decreased from thirty to fifteen. It’s no more a middle-aged homemaker’s disorder but likewise an adolescent’s disorder.


Optimists anticipate the best. The delineating feature of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad things will happen ,last a long time and sabotage everything they do, and that it’s their own fault.


The reality is optimists are faced with the same adversity of this world. What differs is the way they look at their misfortune, it’s the contrary way.

They tend to think defeat is just an impermanent setback, that its reasons are held to this one case.


Optimists tend to center on and design for the ‘issue’ at hand. They utilize ‘positive reinterpretation.’ Put differently, they most likely re-explain a negative experience in a sense that helps them learn and mature.


Such individuals are unfazed by the tough situation. They comprehend it as a challenge and try more.

They won’t state “matters will never get better,” “If I bombed once, it will occur again” and “If I experience bad luck in one area of my life, then it will occur in my whole life.”


Positive anticipations of optimists likewise predict better responses during transitions to fresh surroundings, sudden calamities, and improbable twists. If they fall, they’ll get up. They see opportunities rather than obstructions.


Individuals respond positively to optimists. Optimists are proactive and to a lesser extent dependent on other people for their happiness.

They find no need to command or manipulate individuals. They generally draw individuals towards them.


Their affirmative view of the world may be contagious and influence those they’re with. In life, these individuals frequently win elections; get voted most congenial and sought-after for advice.


Optimists are fitter and live longer. Medical inquiry has justified that uncomplicated pleasures and a favorable outlook may cause a measurable gain in the body’s power to fight disease.


Optimists’ health is remarkably great. They age well, have less of the common physical ills of middle age and outlive those prone to damaging thoughts.


So why not be an optimist now? How come you don’t look forward to success in all your enterprises? You’re bound to hit lows occasionally but don’t merely stay there. Think positively and inspire other people to do


Practice these simple steps everyday and eventually, you will find yourself breaking away from the chains of negativity. Start changing your life today!



How To Conquer Self-Consciousness?


Daily speech offers one of the vast opportunities for eliminating self-consciousness. Everyone should aim here to develop definiteness of idea, sincerity of expression, and concentration of mind.

Nothing leads so quickly to hesitation and embarrassment in a speaker as mental uncertainty. To speak confidently, they must not guess, or imagine, or take for granted: they must know.

Lack of proper mental equipment is responsible for a large part of the fearfulness of people.  People who really know what they’re talking about, and are absolutely sure of it, are likely to be sure of themselves.

It shows itself in their voice, their use of words, their manner, and their entire personality.

The speaker should cultivate sincerity in his conversation. They will avoid formal compliments and empty platitudes. They will not talk like a book. They will not talk just to hear themselves.

They will speak for a purpose, and this will easily enable them to concentrate their mind upon the subject of his conversation. They will listen attentively and get  interested to others.

Above all, they will not speak of themselves unless obliged to do so, and then briefly, modestly, and gently.

In what manner, then, shall they speak? Newman’s definition of a good person answers that question well:

“They guard against unseasonable allusions or topics which may irritate; they are seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. They make light of favors when they do them, and seem to be receiving when they are conferring. They never speak of themselves except when compelled, never defend themselves by a mere retort; they have no ears for slander or gossip, are scrupulous in assigning motives to those who interfere with them, and interpret everything for the best.”

This self-discipline begins naturally with deep breathing. Many people don’t realize that the manner in which they breathe affects their attitude of mind. It is altogether too common to use but one half of the breathing capacity.

A man who breathes only with his upper chest lacks the vigor and vitality essential to a high degree of self-confidence. Deep breathing should be practiced daily until it becomes an unconscious habit.

overcoming self-consciousness

So, what is the remedy for self-consciousness?

It’s mainly a matter of securing control of one’s thoughts and intelligently directing them.

The mind is a machine, which must be made obedient to the owner’s will. When brought under subjection, it will serve man’s highest and best purposes, but left to itself it may run easily to confusion and destruction.

You might say: “But my mind wanders.” Then go after it and bring it back. You say you can’t?  Who’s operating your mind?  Does it run itself?

What would you think of a train that had no engineer, no conductor, no one to direct it, and was allowed to run just anywhere?

Yet this is what you permit with your train of ideas. Be sensible. Take hold of yourself seriously. Set your will to work.  Straighten your spine. Take time today for mental overhauling.

You are about to educate your will and it’s serious business. Procrastination will not do. From this time forward resolve to control and direct your mental powers for definite purposes.

Let it be said here, without attempt to moralize, that wrongdoing will contribute its share to self-consciousness. It may be an injury done another, an unfair advantage in business, or a secret habit; but whatever it may be.

Its mark is seared upon the conscience, and sooner or later finds expression in embarrassment.

What should one do who comes under this classification?  Repair the injury, stop every undesirable habit, and resolve hereafter to deal justly with all people.

Constantly hold in your mind a high estimate of yourself, but be sure you have reasons for doing so. It is of little use to say you are well if you are ill.

Don’t deceive yourself. You are no greater than the sum of your thoughts and habits.

Do you have good and sufficient reasons for holding yourself in high esteem? Are you a person of noble impulses?  Is your ambition lofty?

Do you have high ideals and do you work persistently to realize them?  Are you doing the best you can?  Do you have an uncompromising love for truth?

A businessman recently wrote to a teacher, saying:

“I lose control and become embarrassed when I speak even to my own employees, and can’t keep a straight face at any time when meeting strangers. I feel embarrassed, turn red in the face, and otherwise feel uncomfortable when talking to a single individual.  If I were called upon to address an audience, I believe I should drop dead.”

This is an illustration of the extremes to which self-consciousness may carry its victim.  The mind is a fertile field for the growth of all kinds of thought.

If false and negative ideas are allowed to take root, they, like weeds of an ordinary field, spread with wonderful rapidity, and may easily discourage and overwhelm the owner.

The man to whom we have referred has long neglected his mental field and now finds himself in a bad way.

The remedy for him, and for lots of others, is to patiently root out every obnoxious habit and to substitute strong, healthy, positive thoughts in its place.

They must be content with small victories at first, since they have permitted their mental field and garden to be overrun with these objectionable thought habits. On the other hand, they can comfort themselves with the assurance that in this way they can and will attain success.

Timid people concern themselves too much about what others will think and say. They are constantly studying the impression they are making upon people who probably are not even thinking of them.

Their super sensitiveness causes them to imagine themselves being criticized, slighted, and unfairly condemned by those who all the while are absorbed in their own affairs.

A man may be on the road to success when a single act of timidity may ruin all his chances. People lose confidence in him if he lacks faith in himself.


Courage is admired, fear never is.

Courage is dignified, fear is repulsive. The man of courage is welcomed everywhere, while fear invites itself to a seat in the rear.

The following incident actually occurred in a second-hand bookshop. The salesman had been talking for some time to a customer, when another man who had selected a book for himself mustered up enough courage to say:

“Don’t let me interrupt you, sir, if you are busy with that gentleman—I wanted to get—this book–but I can just as well call in on my way back–I would have to trouble you anyway–to change–a five-dollar bill–and perhaps–you haven’t–the change-so I’ll come back–in a little while–don’t trouble, sir–and then I’ll have the right change with me.”

This sounds exaggerated, but it can be vouched for. What chance, do you think does that man have for advancement or distinction in the world?  He is doomed to failure unless he changes his entire mental attitude.

Every person should learn to stand firmly upon his own feet. As themselves they may become great; as an imitator they will amount to little.

“Intellectual intrepidity,” says Samuel Smiles “is one of the vital conditions of independence and self-reliance in character. A man must have the courage to be himself, and not the shadow or the echo of another. He must exercise his own powers, think his own thoughts, and speak his own sentiments. He must elaborate his own opinions, and form his own convictions. It has been said that they who dare not form an opinion must be a coward; they who will not, must be an idler; they who cannot, must be a fool.”

The timid man should take inspiration from the experience of many of the world’s greatest orators and actors. For the most part they at first were self-conscious men.

Demosthenes, Cicero, Curran, Chalmers, Erskine, Pitt, Gladstone, Disraeli, Mirabeau, Patrick Henry, Clay, Gough, Beecher, Salvini, Henry Irving, Richard Mansfield, and many others were subject to “stage-fright.”

But this sensitivity, when at last controlled and intelligently directed, enabled them to reach a foremost place among distinguished men.

It is said of Rufus Choate, the great lawyer that before an important address to a jury looked as nervous and wretched as a criminal about to be hanged.

Probably every public speaker who has amounted to anything could testify to this initial feeling of nervousness or anxiety. But the cure lies in becoming so absorbed in one’s subject, or the welfare of others, as to forget one’s self.

Self-consciousness may arise from self-conceit.

The victim says to himself:  “What impression am I making?” “Do I look okay? ” “What are they thinking and saying about me?”

On the other hand, it may be due to extreme humility.  Such a man says inwardly: “I am not equal to this,” “I lack so many things,” “If I had only been born right,” “My father was bashful before me,” “I know I’m going to fail.”

Natural humility need not necessarily be a stumbling block to any person. It’s a safeguard against rashness, familiarity, and over-confidence.

The evil of extreme self-consciousness is that it makes a man do so many things they don’t want to do.

It changes his line of conduct a hundred times a day, makes him say “yes” when they would rather say “no,” and, in short, robs him of his power and individuality.

When Thackeray said that sensitivity was a great mistake in a public man, he doubtless meant that super sensitivity by which a man loses initiative, self-reliance, and independence.

A self-conscious man must sooner or later rid himself of this fault if he is to be preeminently successful.

overcome selfconsciousness_1

overcome selfconsciousness_2


How To Be More Creative?

more creative

What is creativity?

Creativity is an act of faith and an art of discovery. It is the ability of a person to create something that is new to the world based upon an innovation.

Example: When an apple fell on the head of Newton he formulated laws of motion which are the basis of many present day calculations. When Sir Thomas Alva Edison analyzed the need of light to fight with dark in the night, this analysis guided him in the invention of the electric bulb.

To some extent, creativity lies in every person whether he is a famous scientist or lower grade employee.

Creativity lies in depth of your soul in form of innovative ideas which either gets buried in corners of your heart with the passage of time or you do not get support from society.

So, the need only is to give life to your innovation.

Let yourself come out of you. Forget about restrictions of society, existing past trends and gain faith in you.

You can learn to be more creative by observing and following highly creative people through reading their biographies.

Give shape to your thoughts and bring your thoughts into life. Don’t be protractive in giving life to your innovation.

Creative people have a strong desire to express themselves and sometimes they need to fight to secure their rights.

artist-creative people

What are the qualities of creative people?

The answer to this question is that between a simple man and highly creative people the difference lies in mind, attitude and perception.

The main characteristics where creativity of a person can be judged are:


Creative people are not conventional. They need not stick to society norms and standards. They believe only in what they feel is right. They can bring an end to existing conventions.

Example: Galileo made a revolt against the existing beliefs in his times and proved that the earth revolves round the sun. And his work of that time is the basis of many calculations of the present era.


Creative people do not believe in superstition and have a strong desire to uncover the truth.


Creative people are highly intelligent and are constantly coming up with innovative ideas. They are always in search of what is missing in the world and what could be done more to make life better.


Creative people are driven by their vision. They have a strong desire to convert their vision into their achievements.


Creative people are visionary. Their vision lies in their heart and soul. And their priority is always towards their vision.


Creative people are highly intuitive. The work they have to do originate in their soul. They listen to their soul and let their soul guide them in their life.

Before thinking about how to be more creative, there are some real barriers that some people seem to have when wanting to enhance creativity.


Think if any of these things are applicable to you and your life:

1. Lack of time.

This is not as major as you may think. Linking thoughts and ideas only take seconds. It can happen anytime, anywhere.

Provided you are in the right state and pay attention to your own experience.

Creativity is more about the quality of the time you have and being receptive to yourself, though this does take some time.

2. Fear of being judged.

Individuals were often scared of expressing ideas. Creativity results in unusual ideas and perhaps even being different in some way.

They can be thought of as strange, odd or challenging. Fear of being considered weird, stupid or just different often kills creativity.

3. Lack of self-esteem.

When you do something creative, you go beyond the bounds of what has been safe and familiar in the past, to yourself and maybe even others.

When you are not sure about yourself, being different in any way can feel risky or make you feel vulnerable. The danger is that you give up your new insight to just blend in. Smash out of those shackles!

4. Fear of failure.

This inhibits anyone. If you are making a new connection in your brain there can be no inherent “right” or “wrong” about it.

Failure can only have two meanings really. First, that it didn’t work in the way you wanted it to. Second, someone else did not like it.

But so what!

Creativity is not reserved for genius only. Einstein was brilliant but he is not necessarily the best model of creativity for us.

You do not need specialist expertise to be creative. The fruits of your creativity may manifest in many, many differing ways.

If at any time you doubt your ability to be creative, remind yourself that several times every night you create an entirely new dream, which you script, act in and watch, which involves all your senses and has effects that can last long after they are over.

This creation is so very effortless most people don’t even recognize it as such.


How to be more creative?

How does one actually go about getting more creative?

Here are some ideas:

1. Find the right frame of mind.

Explore what states you associate with being creative. Discover properly what it is that triggers and maintains you being creative.

What’s your best time of day? What’s the best environment? Do you need to be alone or with others or alone in the midst of others? Do you need sounds or silence or background sounds?

Build a profile of your creativity state, then make time and space for it on a regular basis instead of waiting for some divine intervention and for it to just happen on its own.

2. Cultivate dreaming.

Pay attention to your experience of life and attention to your existing creativity rather than dismissing daydreams and dreams.

Don’t allow yourself to waste what you may already be discovering by ignoring it.

3. Ask yourself “What if?” and “What else?” and “How else?”

Always go beyond what you first thought, find more and more different ideas.

Keep on asking of the possibilities no matter how strange they may be.

Inquire relevant or even irrelevant questions. You may never know where the answers will lead you.

4. When and/or if you hit a problem, pretend your usual solution is not available.

This can work in many different ways. If your PC crashes today, how else might you do your work? If you usually argue face to face, what would happen if you wrote your feelings down instead?

Some solutions may be no better than the ones you’re used to. Others may offer you brilliant new opportunities. Do something different.

5. See how many different results you can get with the same ingredients.

Perhaps, many of you know that there is a cookbook called “Recipes 1-2-3” by Rozanne Gold, in which every recipe is made out of only three ingredients.

Some recipes use the same three ingredients but different processes or quantities come up with different results.

You can have some great fun by taking an everyday object and imagine or think about how many other uses it can have, you can even think about how to combine them with other objects.

6. Think of different ways to do the familiar.

Change the order in which you do things, use different things, use your less favored hand; as soon as you break the routine, move from a state where you are on auto-pilot to one where you are alive and alert.

You exercise unfamiliar brain connections and help build new links in your brain. A glorious feeling!

7. Look out for the difference that makes the difference.

When you encounter something that strikes you as different, ask yourself what it is about it that is so different or new or unusual. Where does the key difference actually lie?

Search for the uniqueness or exceptionality. What is the ‘it’ factor that makes it stand out?


Disney Creativity

The Disney creativity strategy is for developing your dreams and giving them the best possible chance of becoming reality.

It is named after Walt Disney, who often took on three different roles when his team was developing an idea; the dreamer, the realist, and the critic.

Robert Dilts, an NLP pioneer, modeled and developed this strategy as an NLP tools.

The strategy separates out these three vital roles involved in the process of translating creative ideas into reality so that they can be explored separately for maximum clarity and effect.

You can also play all three roles yourself with your own wants, needs, and goals.

However, the usual way to use it is to allocate three roles to different people (realist, dreamer, and critic) to assess plans or tasks.

Ask someone to act as the dreamer and tell you all the possibilities of the idea.

Ask someone else to examine exactly what would be involved in putting it into practice (realist), and someone to take a hard look at it and really evaluate its strengths and weaknesses (critic).

You may want to rotate the roles. If doing it on your own, be sure to keep the roles very separate and write them down.

You can even use this in a meeting broken down into three stages and each role as a separate stage. Get everyone brainstorming and being creative first.

Then, get them thinking about what would actually have to happen in practical terms. Then, get them critically evaluating the possibilities.

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Creative Solutions with ‘What If?’

For the most creative solutions, you need to get your mind looking in new directions.

One of the most systematic ways to do this is with a list of words, primarily adjectives, to create “what if?” scenarios.

The process starts with the question, “what if it was…” and then you insert a word from the list.

It” in the question is the problem you’re working on, or the current solution or situation.

Let’s explain the process with an example or two.

Example one: You have an unpleasant co-worker. You aren’t sure how to deal with him, so you ask about the problem, “What if it was…” and insert from the list “smaller.”

How could you make the problem smaller? Spend less time with that person? Get reassigned?

“What if it was…  fun?” makes you wonder if being annoying yourself might keep the other person away from you.

“Closer” makes you wonder if this person might be nicer to you if they knew you better.

You continue down the list and work with each word a bit to get new ideas, which you will look at more analytically later.

Example two: Your house is too crowded because you’re running your business in it. You ask, “What if it was…” and insert the word list, “smaller.”

Your house is already too small, but could the business be smaller?

The word “divided” might give you the idea to keep the business in just one part of the house.

Since most words on the list won’t help, you can go through the irrelevant ones quickly. But don’t automatically dismiss them without a few seconds of consideration.

“What if it was hopeless?” may seem like a useless question, or it may make you realize that you just can’t keep the business in the house any longer.

Moving into a rented office might be the most profitable as your creative solutions.


The Creative Solutions Word List

Feel free to create your own list of words. You’ll want to use adjectives, descriptive phrases, and any words that can change your perspective.

Here is a short list to get you started:

What if it was… larger, smaller, farther away, closer, sooner, later, easier, more difficult, higher, fat, rich, short, black, certain, hopeless, newer, boring, casual, subtracted from, cheaper, common, divided, more interesting, extravagant, subtle, or fun?

Just as with most problem-solving techniques, it’s important to allow the ideas to flow without judging them initially.

You don’t want to stifle the creative process. Take notes, and then evaluate your ideas later, when you have a page full of creative solutions.

Have some fun being creative and doing things differently to generate more creativity. It feels wonderful!

And if you have found that your progress to success or the outcomes you desire has been blocked or gone stagnant, then think about being more creative in how and what you are doing.

Creative Thinking Techniques

Do you want to have a mind of a creative inventor? Start redesigning everything you see.

Imagine better cars, faster ways to serve food, or better light bulbs. If you do this every day for three weeks, it will become a habit.

Do you want to be the person who always has something interesting to say? Train yourself to look at things from other perspectives.

What would the president say about this? How would a Martian view it?

What’s the opposite perspective? The point isn’t to ask others silly questions, but to ask yourself, to see what interesting ideas you can get.

Do these until it is a habit and you’ll always have something interesting to add to a conversation.

Want systematic creativity in poetry?

Put a word on each of 40 cards: 10 nouns, 10 verbs, 10 adjectives, and 10 random words.

Shuffle, deal out four cards and write a 4-line poem using one of the words in each line. Your mind will find a poetic use of any word if you use this method often.

Hopefully, the examples, ideas, and strategies presented above would help you to be more creative. There is no formula or particular technique to be creative.

Since you are unique and different from the rest, you have your own way of doing things and making things work for you. You have your own way to be creative!

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Ponder On These Motivational Sayings For Your Success

motivational sayings

Is it possible to use motivational and inspirational quotes to achieve your goals? Find out how and check some quotations for success for success and business below.

Changing your day-to-day behaviors may be easier than previously imagined.

By meditating on and repeating motivational and inspirational quotes, you are better prepared to change your thought patterns, behaviors and in turn, change your lives.

Here’s how it’s done.

If you believe something to be easy, you find little, if any struggle in accomplishing it.

However, if you imagine something to be difficult to accomplish, then your struggle becomes more apparent.

In fact, if you imagine that it is difficult to change a specific behavior, then you will always find experiences that will justify that belief.

Take this for example. You wake up one morning and decide that:

“This is the day I start losing weight. When things get difficult, I will not reach for junk food, but instead I will focus on something else to keep my mind occupied. It’ll be tough at first, but I’m going to give it a try.”

If you continue with this thought pattern and belief, don’t be surprised to find yourself struggling more often than not. Why?

If you look at this example closely you find a couple of thought patterns and beliefs already in place.

Be determined to do something good for ourselves, but we do ourselves a disservice by choosing certain negative thought patterns, beliefs and words that go along with it.

As you have said,

“When things get difficult….”

(This is already assuming that there will be difficult moments! Strike one!)

“It’ll be tough at first…”

(This is already assuming it will be difficult at first! Strike two!)

“…but I’m going to give it a try.”

(Remember the movie “The Karate Kid”…”There is no “try”, there is only “do”. Strike three!)

Now there are hundreds of products out there that will assist people in losing weight. Some, if not all of them, may work for various people at various stages of their goal.

But for many people who have convinced themselves that losing weight is difficult, some products may fall short when our thought patterns are stronger than our desire to change.

Here is something that you can do to change any behavior you no longer desired.

1. Decide to change your way of thinking about a behavior, making it easier for you to think about it. Phrase it in a simple way.

2. Choose a word to focus on to change that behavior for a period of time.

3. Find a minimum of three motivational or inspirational quotes related to that specific word that is powerful enough to change your current thought patterns the moment you read them.

Meditate on them and repeat them, silently or out loud, every chance you get.

Be patient. Stick with it. Give it some time.

Why do you think companies offer a 30-day money back guarantee? They know that if you do something for 30 days it becomes a habit and you no longer need to return it! Give it time.

The first step to what you want to accomplish is changing your mind and the thought patterns and beliefs associated with your behavior.

Thoughts are the precursor to action, meaning that thoughts occur before any action takes place. That’s what needs to be changed first – your thoughts.

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Motivational Sayings

Why read motivational sayings? For motivation! You might need a bit if you can use last year’s list of goals this year because it’s as good as new.

All of us can benefit from inspirational thoughts, so here are ten great ones.

“Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are.” – Dale Carnegie


“Do not wait; the time will never be ‘just right.’ Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along.” – Napoleon Hill


“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson


“Some men see things as they are and say, “Why?” I dream of things that never were and say, “Why not?” – George Bernard Shaw


“A small trouble is like a pebble. Hold it too close to your eye and it fills the whole world and puts everything out of focus. Hold it at a proper distance and it can be examined and properly classified. Throw it at your feet and it can be seen in its true setting, just one more tiny bump on the pathway of life.” – Celia Luce


“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” – Carl Bard


“I’m not telling you it is going to be easy – I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it.” – Art Williams


Motivational Sayings on Attitude

“There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is  attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” – W. Clement Stone


“Nothing on earth can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” – Thomas Jefferson


“A person cannot directly choose his circumstances, but he can choose his thoughts, and so indirectly, yet surely, shape his circumstances.” – James Allen


“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.” – Mohandas Karamchand (Mahatma) Gandhi


These are quotes that mean something to me. Hopefully one or two of them are also inspiring to you.

If not, maybe they will motivate you to create your own motivational sayings.


Motivational Quotes for Business and other Work Environments

Some days a motivational quote can provide a quick pick-me-up for employees and even management. They can be a breath of fresh air when it comes to a drab afternoon.

These are also a great way to jazz up a newsletter or a memo or even to simply print and attach to a bulletin board. Using quotes like these are perfect ways to create a motivational and successful work environment.

As Mr. Rick Pitino says “The only way to get people to like working hard is to motivate them. Today, people must understand why they’re working hard. Every individual in an organization is motivated by something different.” –Rick Pitino

Motivational Quotes:
1. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi


2. “You need to be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we all help one another, everybody wins.” – Jim Stovall


3. “The only way around is through.” – Robert Frost


4. “You only have to do a very few things right in your life so long as you don’t do too many things wrong.” – Warren Buffet


5. “You must remain focused on your journey to greatness.” – Les Brown


6. “Far and away the best prize that life offers is the chance to work hard at work worth doing.” – Theodore Roosevelt


7. “Where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier.” – Charles F. Kettering


8. “Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right!” – Henry Ford


9. “You must either modify your dreams or magnify your skills.” – Jim Rohn


10. “Who likes not his business, his business likes not him.” – William Hazlitt


11. “Winners take time to relish their work, knowing that scaling the mountain is what makes the view from the top so exhilarating.” – Denis Waitley


12. “Management is nothing more than motivating other people.” – Le Iacocca


13. “Motivation is the art of getting people to do what you want them to do because they want to do it.” – Dwight D.


14. “The most serious mistakes are not being made as a result of wrong answers. The truly dangerous thing is asking the wrong question.” – Drucker


15. “Why did I want to win? Because I didn’t want to lose!” – Max Schmelling


16. “To succeed in business, to reach the top, an individual must know all it is possible to know about that business.” – J. Paul Getty


17. “To win without risk is to triumph without glory.” – Pierre Corneille


18. “To succeed… You need to find something to hold on to, something to motivate you, something to inspire you.” – Tony Dorsett


19. “The only limits are, as always, those of vision.” – James Broughton


20. “To think creatively, we must be able to look afresh at what we normally take for granted.” – George Kneller


21. “To the degree we’re not living our dreams; our comfort zone has more control of us than we have over ourselves.” – Peter McWilliams


22. “To think is easy. To act is difficult. To act as one thinks is the most difficult.” – Johann Wolfgang Von Goeth


23. “To waken interest and kindle enthusiasm is the sure way to teach easily and successfully.” – Tryon Edwards


24. “Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.” – Spanish Proverb


25. “The noblest search is the search for excellence.” – Lyndon B. Johnson


26. “The man who does not work for the love of work but only for money is not likely to neither make money nor find much fun in life.” – Charles M. Schwab


27. “The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water; but to walk on the earth.” – Chinese Proverb


28. “The new source of power is not money in the hands of a few, but information in the hands of many.” – John Naisbitt


29. “The man who will use his skill and constructive imagination to see how much he can give for a dollar, instead of how little he can give for a dollar, is bound to succeed.” – Henry Ford


30. “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.” – Napoleon Hill


Many employers will add these quotes inside the employees’ paycheck envelope.

Sometimes it may be a motivational quote, other times a silly antidote.

Include employee birthdays or other important events to help your employees feel a part of the team.

Nevertheless, wherever you are, motivational sayings or inspirational quotes are catchy little phrases that can get your attention, pause for a while, and think about it.

Ponder its truth. How it is related to you, how it challenged you and how can you make things even better and what can you do to make them happen.

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How To Build Self-Confidence?

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Before discussing how to build self-confidence and how to be committed to it, let us review first what is confidence as well as self-confidence.

Definition of Confidence

The word confidence has been defined variously by different writers, scholars, academicians and psychologists.

It is a term which is generally understood to refer  to the belief, consciousness and trust that a person, entity, authority or another thing is capable of succeeding in something. It also refers to the belief in yourself self-confidence.

Confidence is a vital trait which has made countries win wars; individuals win competitions and games, people do what seems impossible and it has also helped men and women make history.

It is required by everyone be it at marriage, in school, at work, in positions of leadership and generally in your daily life.

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What is self-confidence?

“Self-confidence gives you the freedom to make mistakes and cope with failure without feeling that your world has come to an end or that you are a worthless person.” – Anon

Self-confidence refers to the trust or confidence in self. It is the belief that you or the person or entity you are acting for will emerge victorious and successful in the task you want to undertake.

With self-confidence, you are able to meet most of the challenges in life. It will also help you do what people believe is impossible or difficult to do.

Self-confidence is the key to unlocking the door for successes in life.

Most people lack self-confidence and this causes them to miss many opportunities. You have to interact, talk and communicate with people if you are to progress.

You have to know how to talk to the public.  All well-known and respected public speakers have self-confidence.

Self-confidence at the workplace will make you discharge your daily duties and obligations confidently while you are sure that everything is going on well as required.

The Components of Self-Confidence

In Self-confidence does not happen; some other factors must be present so that it can develop. It is a component of several other attributes. You must have vision and goals so as to be self-confident.

You also need to have positive self-esteem and self-efficacy. You need to possess several attributes in order to trust yourself.

If you were not born naturally self-confident as is the case with most people, then you will be required to work so as to achieve this vital attribute.

There are two main components of self-confidence namely self-esteem and self-efficacy.

These two factors (self-esteem and self-efficacy) are very important in the life of an individual.

Self-efficacy is the belief that you are up to certain task or challenge. It is the belief that you are not disadvantaged; that you are proud of who you are and what you can do.

It is the capacity to motivate yourself when you fail.  Self-esteem, on the other hand, is the belief that you are a person who is worth and that you are capable of doing something positive.

If you lack either self-efficacy or self-esteem you cannot create your ideal lifestyle by realizing your full potential through confidence.

If you lack both self-esteem and self-efficacy it will be worse because you will have a feeling that you are worthless, unimportant and that you are inferior to others.

Life will not make sense and this is dangerous because you may have suicidal thoughts, stress, depression, anxiety or even go insane!

Self-confidence which is the product of mainly self-efficacy and self-esteem will give you peace of mind even if you do not have material wealth.

If you are a leader, self-confidence will give you the power to lead but not to rule or oppress.

If you are a servant, it will give you the power to serve and please your master.  It will give you the capability to lead your life and live without hassle, tension or stress.

Self-confidence can be built. You can train yourself.  Like any other building activity, you have to mix several things so as to build self-confidence.

If you build enough self-confidence, you will have built a link to success and creating your ideal lifestyle.

Confidence is the pathway to success it will make you achieve what you what. It will make you a real model which inspires most people.


Building Self-Confidence

Though some people are naturally born with self-confidence, most of them learn or acquire it as they grow. There is nothing which is as good as having self-confidence.

Confidence is everything because you will proud of who you are, what you do and what you say. People will also trust and have faith in you if you.

As stated earlier the well-renowned speakers have one character which most people lack and it is none other than self-confidence.

If you have self-confidence you can convince. If you lack this attribute you will find it very hard or impossible to take leadership roles.

The most successful men and women build self-confidence in themselves and in whatever they do. Self-confidence will also help you overcome challenges in life.

It will help you make decisions quickly and a put off any doubts which you may have on the probability of success or failure of the thing you want to undertake.

Research has shown that most people are reluctant to back or approve something which was proposed by someone who at the time of leadership or proposal was fumbling, apologetic and nervous.

You will persuade most people if you hold you head high, answer questions directly and with confidence and when you openly admit when you do not know something.

If you are self-confident you will inspire many others including your seniors, equals, audience, friends, peers and even customers.

Gaining the confidence of others is always termed as success and you should aim at doing so all the time. As stated earlier, self-confidence can be learned or acquired if you are not naturally born with it.

Your level of confidence can be seen in various ways including what you say, how you talk, body language and behavior among others. It will help you rejuvenate during the low moments and events in life.

It is true that a person with confidence is considered to be a person with an impressive personality.

You have to work on personal development at all times, because this is what really helps you grow as an individual, and for that, you will need to work at improving your self-confidence.

But, what are the ways in which you can do that?

Learn to confront your fears. No person in this world is without apprehension. You might be skeptical about achieving a particular thing, or you may be fazed by some weakness that lies within you.

These are your fears. They are the detrimental factors in building your personality.

The first step towards beginning to improve your self-confidence is to be truthful to yourself and understand what it is that hampers your growth as an individual.

When you know what your fears are, you will automatically know what you can do about it. If your fears are about your work, then all you need to do is to concentrate on the results you want to achieve.

These are the results you want—what must you do for achieving them? In your mind, find the answers to this question.

When you know for sure what methods you need to adopt to achieve the results you want, you will become confident about them. Your conviction levels will increase.

The best way to achieve self-confidence is through achievement. If you achieve something, however small, you become confident that you can do it. Even if your achievement is minor, it gears you for the bigger things.

Having done something once is a great motivation for doing the same kind of thing again. So, don’t be hesitant to try new things.

Try whatever you can within your field of work, or passion. It is these small achievements that will egg you on for greater glories.

Always keep working on your personality. You must amass as much knowledge in your field as you can. Read about the famous people in your field.

See how they went about their achievements. This gives you great inspiration to surge ahead as well.

When you are building your self-confidence, these are the things that really work. Be better acquainted with your own pluses and minuses and don’t let that spirit dwindle.

Soon, people are going to think of you as a stronger, more confident person.


5 Tips On How To Build Self Confidence

Below there are five simple techniques that have been proved to help build self-confidence today.

1. Talk to yourself.

It sounds crazy but it works. All of us have a running monologue constantly in our heads, whether we realize it or not. Everything you see, hear or touch sparks off an immediate dialog in our thoughts.

For those who lack confidence this monologue is filled with negative messages many of which are the negative side of adverts from television, radio, advertisement boardings, newspapers, and just overhearing other people talk.

These negative thoughts literally suck energy from your minds and bodies and block the flow of positive messages.

You need to hear the positive messages as they will build self-confidence today and raise your self-esteem. Take control.

Use your inner thoughts to talk to yourself in a positive manner, as often as you can.

Take control. Use your inner thoughts to talk to yourself in a positive manner, as often as you can.

2. Dress as smartly and as classily as you can.

You won’t feel at your best if you don’t look your best. You will be amazed at just how much more confidence you will have just looking your best.

It just feels good when you are wearing your best clothes, are well groomed, and are surrounded by a clean environment.

So what if it is Saturday, you need to build self-confidence today, not next week. Put on your nice clothes, get the car washed, style that hair! A hairdresser once told me “Everyday is show time!”

3. Give thanks.

Increase your self-esteem even more by giving thanks to what you are, how you look, and what you are doing.

Say “thank you” to yourself to everything you see, all whom you meet, and each smile that you receive.

4. Stand or sit correctly.

How you stand sends out a message to the World, and in turn, back to you. This results in improving how you feel about yourself and will build self-confidence today and every day.

There is scientific evidence that shows how posture affects our mood. Do not slouch. Slouching produces a down mood. By slouching you are telling the world and yourself it doesn’t matter, you don’t matter.

Standing tall and upright will actually lift your mood. Help build up your confidence by pulling back those shoulders, stop that slouch, and walk proud.

5. Smile.

Just smile and things seem better somehow. Practice smiling regularly and get your facial muscles used to the physical act of smiling.

Go to the mirror and smile – make yourself. Not a grimace, but a proper smile.

If you don’t think you can try this:

1. Open your eyes as wide as you can. Try and get your eyebrows right up to your hairline.

2. Slightly open your mouth.

3. Pull the corners of your mouth back towards your ears. If you’re not sure, pull them back with your fingers so you know what it feels like then try again without your fingers.

4. Repeat 50 times. Get your facial muscles used to smiling and you will smile more and encourage smiles from others.

This will make you feel happier and with that, you’ll build self-confidence today.

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How To Overcome Adversity?



Is there any person on this earth who has not faced adversity? Life can be good, but adversities are also part of life.

How does one face them with calmness? It is difficult if the extent of adversity is very high. But one has to live through adversities and come back in life to succeed again.

A sudden accident can make one lose limbs. A man, who makes his living with his hands, will surely feel very bad and devastated if he loses his working hand.

How about the effect of the announcement by the doctor that your child has cancer? Can parents take this news calmly? They will most probably faint when they hear it first.

Some adversities are such that they shatter lives forever. But strong will and faith can help one face and conquer many adversities.

Who has not heard of Helen Keller? Her blindness and deafness could not shatter her invincible spirit. There are many instances of such people.

Look at the life as a moving vehicle. As you move, you pass many scenes. Some good and some dirty. But you sit through the journey peacefully and reach your destination.

You may mostly remain unmoved because – you are not directly pained by the scenes outside and your focus is more on reaching the destination. In any adversity, at least the second part can be applied.

Come what may, your objective should be to create a good life and live as an example for others. That should be your destination and that should be your motivation.

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“We shall draw from the heart of suffering itself the means of inspiration and survival.”

~ Winston Churchill

The ways that some folks dealt with adversity did vary. Some had great religious faith, others had an unquenchable zest for life, and others had a great determination that they could and would overcome and difficulty.

If you think about it then this does seem to make sense. After all, the longer you live then the more adversity you must overcome.

Human life is fraught with adversity — both physical and emotional — although each person’s experience varies greatly.

In order to survive adversity, to overcome loss and difficulty, and to succeed in life a person must have inner resources to draw from.

As Oliver Wendell Holmes says, “If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it round.  Trouble creates a capacity to handle it.  I don’t embrace trouble; that’s as bad as treating it as an enemy.  But I do say meet it as a friend, for you’ll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it.”

Perhaps, you have seen the evidence of this even if you have never formulated a scientific theory about it.

You have seen the cancer patient diagnosed and then does not even live out the time doctors predicted.

You have seen the heart patient diagnosed who far outlives expectations — by months and then years. What makes the difference between these two groups of people?

It has to be a will to live, some inner resource, that one group possesses and the other does not.

Now here’s a story an interesting story about adversity that you might enjoy.



A farmer owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer’s well. The farmer discovered the mule ‘braying’ — or whatever mules do once they fall into wells.

After cautiously assessing the state of affairs, the farmer felt sorry for the mule but resolved that neither the mule nor the well was worth saving.

Rather, he called his neighbors together and told them what had occurred and asked them to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery.

At the start, the old mule was hysterical! But as the farmer and his neighbors proceeded shoveling and the dirt hit his back, a thought struck him.

It all of a sudden dawned on him that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back: he had better shake it off and step up!

This is what the old mule did, blow after blow. “Shake it off and step up… shake it off and step up… shake it off and step up!” he repeated to encourage himself.

Regardless how painful the blows, or distressing the state of affairs appeared, the old mule fought “panic” and simply kept right on shaking it off and stepping up!

You guessed it! It wasn’t long before the old mule, battered and exhausted, stepped triumphantly over the wall of that well!

What appeared like it would bury him, actually end up blessing him – all because of the manner in which he handled his hardship.


facing adversity

7 Essential Steps to Overcoming Adversity


Being Rich

Most people never realize what “rich” truly means. Building wealth isn’t just defined in money. It’s richness in Mind, Body, and Spirit.

You can measure your prosperity in the number of friends, hopes, accomplishments, and feelings of safety you now have.

Decide now to be really rich, never settle, empower yourself and enduring wealth will come to you.


You Need Heroes

Only by striving for something better can you hope to be a role model for others. So who is your hero?

Thankfully, humanity has been blessed with others you can all emulate. Oprah Winfrey is certainly someone who has chosen to overcome adversity in her life.

Have you thought about the difference this one woman is making? She continues to inspire me to keep reaching.


Read and Learn

Never stop finding new information and new viewpoints. Many books have greatly influenced me in positive ways.

And you needn’t be an author or journalist to appreciate the vast knowledge available in libraries, bookstores, and the news media and online.


Giving Is Receiving

You receive back tenfold when you give time and energy to help your communities and your nation.

You, too, can get involved by feeding the hungry, rescuing the needy, reaching abused and neglected kids, volunteering and donating.


Consider Your Health

Don’t wait for a health scare to prompt you to begin some reevaluation in your life.

What can YOU do to improve your health so you will be happier, more meaningful, more abundant life will last longer?


Overcome Fear

By facing the most fear-generating issues in life, you can move on whether your concern is going to the dentist …being rejected by someone …trying something new or redefining something familiar…asking for help or giving it. Ultimately, any fear can be conquered.



Don’t hurt yourself with energy-zapping grudges and bitterness. Remember to find forgiveness, even if you can’t forget. Let’s all look ahead at the new horizon to the Dawning of whatever tomorrow holds!

Wherever you are faced with adversity, meet it with energy, determination, and confidence. Shake it off until you completely overcome it.



How To Fortify Your Emotional Wellness?

emotional wellness


How you meet the challenges of today, will to some extent, influence your future life.

Acquiring the skills required to address emotional wellness will provide you a basis of mental and emotional health.

Emotional wellness has many facets. Put plainly, it’s based on self-esteem-how you feel about yourself and behavior that’s appropriate and sound. Somebody who’s emotionally fit:

Somebody who’s emotionally fit:

  • Comprehends and adjusts to change
  • Manages stress
  • Has a confident self-concept
  • Has the power to love and treasure others
  • Can act independently to meet his or her own requirements

Everybody, including individuals who are emotionally fit, has troubles. Emotionally fit individuals are able to adapt to and solve issues.

And in doing so, they help other people as well as themselves to acquire gratification out of life.

Human Emotions

What is stress?

Stress is a mental, emotional, physical, and often behavioral reaction to a broad assortment of stimuli. Different from popular belief, stress isn’t inevitably induced by an acutely troubling event.

The term really refers to requirements placed on you by day-to-day experiences that result in your body’s energizing itself physiologically to meet those requirements.

Stress isn’t innately negative or positive. What ascertains whether an event (stressor) is negative or positive is your rendition.

The meaning of this point is that you are able to command your view of events, though not inevitably the events themselves, and thereby control tension.

Stress demands, whatever their value, start an arousal of the brain and body. That rousing, if drawn-out, may tire out and hurt a person to the point of distress, dysfunction, and disease.

Consider an analogy from physics and engineering. Stress in these fields entails strain or pressure put on a system.

With some tension, the system adapts or alters somewhat, occasionally getting stronger.

With more stress, the system gets to the point where it will break. Humankind reacts likewise.

Tension is an unavoidable component of living. To be alive is to go through the joys and thwarting of stress. Some stress is beneficial for us, the alleged spice of life.

Other stress, like a poor grade on a test, may be either adverse, if you see it in a purely negative way, or of value, if it serves as a motivator for you to acquire more beneficial study habits.

Since tension is unavoidable, it’s crucial to learn to live with it and make it work for you.

A lot of individuals erroneously believe it’s a sign of weakness or failure to accept that they experience stress. Issues arise when we don’t realize that tension is inducing common difficulties and that it may successfully be handled.

stress_emotional wellness

Does everybody respond to tension the same way?

There are big individual fluctuations in how individuals comprehend and react to stress. A few individuals seem to flourish on deadlines; other people get nervous.

How the body and brain respond to a given stressor is different for each individual. A bit much stress, however, understandably results in too much stimulation and eventual dysfunction.

Tension is more than an obscure incident. It’s the product of a lot of facets of your lifestyle and surroundings.

To cut down or handle stress and its possibly damaging effects, you are able to alter numerous aspects of your lifestyle.

You are able to do this by acquiring methods to reduce external stress, to handle your own inner causes of stress, and to manage acute stress.

What are the perils of not curbing stress?

Persistent stress puts a weight on the body and the brains that may result in you’re not doing your best.

If the tension goes unrecognized and dissonant, it may wear you out and induce assorted physical and emotional symptoms that you might blame on other origins.

It may result in your getting physically ill or even suffering an emotional breakdown.

As your body’s ability to live with stress isn’t inexhaustible, there’s a point at which you get to exhaustion. If your body can’t do away with stress or handle it in a favorable way, the system is overcharged and exhaustion is inevitable.

If you go through a stressor, whether it’s the physical stress of being stuck in a snowstorm or the emotional tension of breaking up with a close acquaintance, your body unconsciously starts an involved set of physiological reactions called the fight-or-flight response.

Our physiology hasn’t changed much since prehistoric times, so the body’s nervous system and hormones mechanically gear up to combat or take flight the nearing peril, although combat or taking flight isn’t a valuable reaction to most sorts of stress encountered nowadays.

If the body could not able to dismiss the energy developed by this or if tension carries on past the initial stage, you move into the resistance stage. Your brain and body stay energized by stress.

At this stage, you might distinguish stress and its consequent emotional and physical stimulation, but you might not associate it to physical sickness or emotional shifts.

Adjust and get used to the state of stimulation to the extent that it no more feels strange. As your minds and bodies are so adaptable, hyper-arousal isn’t acknowledged as a likely problem.

You have lost the power to distinguish imbalance and restore balance until there’s some distinguished issue at the exhaustion stage when the body sends off a message of distress.

To cut down physiological tension, be cognizant of your own biorhythms-for instance, what hour you’re most alert, interested, and active.

Most of us recognize instinctively whether we’re night individuals or morning individuals.

Assign your hardest tasks to your high-power times and your repetitious chores or relaxation to your low-energy periods.

You might not have recognized that there are substances in what you regularly consume and drink that bring about dietary stress.

Caffeine, a stimulant, mimics adrenaline, the main neurotransmitter of the stress reaction.

No-Doz and additional stimulants like decongestants and diet pills excite the nervous system and contribute cumulatively to stimulation.

There’s likewise some evidence that high sugar ingestion might step-up stress, putting you on a blood glucose roller coaster. It is a fast surge of vigor accompanied by an evenly sudden drop in energy and a jumpy, over stimulated sensation.

Habitual dieting and fasting may likewise add to a dietary stress by putting additional demands on your hormonal system to sustain body fuel levels in the face of poor food consumption.

A few researchers think that you need additional vitamins, especially B vitamins if you’re going through increased stress-therefore the plethora of “stress” vitamins presently on the market.

It’s improbable that with a fit normal diet including grains, fruits, and veggies, you’d become lacking in vitamins.

But, as insurance against vitamin deficiency, you might want to take a vitamin supplement – one that doesn’t surpass 100 % of the advocated daily allowance.

Exercising is an effective way of bringing out the energy generated by stress, which is far fitter than letting it develop inside and produce uncomfortable pressure.

An exercise of any sort releases the extra adrenalin rendered by the stress reaction. Exercise likewise produces endorphins, natural pain relievers and euphoric chemicals that help you feel at ease and energized after a workout.

A lot of individuals utilize exercise as their principal stress reducer. Aerobics for twenty or more minutes a day seems to be the most helpful in clearing the stress response. Dancing, weight lifting, and walking may likewise work if you like them.

Breathing processes and exercises have been utilized for centuries to quiet and center the body.

When you’re under stress, your breathing tends to get shallow and your muscles tighten up.

At such times, you frequently utilize only the upper one-third of the chest muscles and a few neck muscles to breathe with.

By breathing deep from your diaphragm, you lessen muscle tension and reduce body stimulation.

empowering emotional health

Empowering Your Emotional Health

There is a phenomenal rise in the growth of fitness clubs and gyms. People have become conscious of their body image that they are willing to go the extra mile just to achieve that sculptured body.

Almost every fitness buff wants to achieve the same figure displayed by models in the pages of the magazines, on billboards, on television, and on movie screens.

People try to find sensible and sustainable ways to achieve and maintain a physically fit body. Yet what is often overlooked is the need to take care of another important aspect of their well-being: their emotional health.

Having a healthy mind and spirit go well with a healthy body. Emotional health is considered an integral part of man’s overall wellness.

Neglecting your emotional health can damage your physical health in the process. Research has shown that one of the leading contributors to illness is stress caused by unresolved emotional issues.

Psychologists believe that feelings or emotions such as fear, joy, sadness, anxiety and anger are mental responses to events, circumstances, people, or our own thoughts and memories.

They course through our conscious and unconscious beings at all times, whether at critical junctures or during seemingly inconsequential moments of our lives.

Biologists, on the other hand, tell us that our emotions are rooted in self-preservation, triggering physiological reactions that enable us to find food, escape danger, and reproduce.

Author Daniel Goleman pointed out in his work, Emotional Intelligence that

“…all emotions are, in essence, impulses to act, the instant plans for handling life that evolution has instilled in us.”

Emotions have also evolved into facial expressions and body language so that each member of the group can signal his or her wants and needs to other members.

As John D. Mayer, a leading expert in the study of emotions has remarked:

“Emotions convey information…about relationships.”

Our emotion can be so powerful that it can even make us sick. It can also be a means to gain healing. Emotions are relayed to the immune system through the autonomic nervous system.

When people experience anxiety, depression and other painful emotions, the immune system can be affected and may cause risk for a whole host of illnesses.

In the same way, having a healthy emotional outlook in life can boost the resistance against disease.

Mayer has emphasized that people can reason with emotions in the same way they reason with cognitive information.

It can be said that a person can actually solve emotional problems just as mathematicians solve math problems, Mayer said.

However, he also acknowledged that some emotions, such as grief and anger, can be harder to reason effectively with than others. Oftentimes, identifying the various emotions at play can be extremely difficult.

Not many experts agree that human beings are born with a full range of emotions.

Instead, they theorize that people were born with instincts and urges, along with an innate capacity for feeling.

As people grow older, they acquire personalities and nurture relationships with others, thus, helping these instincts and urges develop into full-fledged emotions.

Emotional health consists of five key components:

1. Being aware of your emotions.

Emotionally healthy people are in touch with their emotions and can identify and acknowledge them as experience.

2. Being able to process your emotions.

After connecting with their emotions, emotionally healthy people develop appropriate ways of expressing them.

3. Being sensitive to other people and their emotions and having the ability to empathize.

The ability to identify their own emotions enables emotionally healthy people to identify emotions in others and to have an intuitive sense of what it feels like to experience them.

4. Being self-empowered.

Emotionally healthy people honor their emotions, which empowers them to fulfill their goals.

5. Being in healthy relationships.

Using their emotional intelligence and empathy, emotionally healthy people build and maintain strong, functioning relationships.

Just as emotional health can affect a person’s physical health, the same is true with one’s lifestyle making a direct impact on emotional health.

Vitamins and minerals stimulate the production of chemicals in the brain.  These are known as neurotransmitters that regulate our physical and mental health functions, including the way we process emotions.

Minor deficiencies in these nutrients can lead to depression and irritability.  Vitamin and mineral deficiencies also hamper our ability to concentrate and stay motivated.

Definitely, unhealthy foods can adversely affect emotional health. Excessive intake of caffeine also causes physiological and psychological side effects that are often seen in people suffering from anxiety, while a diet with too much sugar has been linked to depression, aggression, and impaired judgment.

Many experts believe that people with strong spiritual fervor tend to have healthier immune systems and were less prone to anxiety, depression, and high blood pressure.

It can be surmised that the faith of religious adherents gave them an enhanced sense of well-being which helped reduce their levels of stress.


Featured Image: Ben White Photography